A Pint of Cthulhu drops its Patreon-only mini-season with “Painted Wastelands” — a blood-funny TTRPG one-shot full of warped landscapes, surreal encounters, and truly unhinged party banter.

In Episode 1 our players wake up in a kaleidoscopic desert, meet a talking cat (Lord Meow-Meow) and his pet human Dave, an Onirimancer named Dr. Emmet Flux, and Jetu Heladay — a three-eyed trans-dimensional tourist carrying a depressed fish called Neville.

The party fights an albino bat-demon (sleep spell FTW), gaining the attention of a grinning skull with tiny flames in its eye-sockets. Night falls, the group gets trapped in a looping road, and a pot-bellied goblin causes chaos around the campfire. Expect fast comedy, improvised roleplay, and weird world-building hints about a sorcerers’ market and hidden temples