Wellish

by Sarah Ritondale

Self-Improvement

Season 4

3 ways self improvement culture is destroying your self worth

What if the habits you call “self-improvement” are actually destroying your self worth? In this episode, we’re talking about 3 extremely normalized behaviors that look like growth in self improvement culture but quietly teach you that who you are right now is never enough. From turning yourself into a constant self-improvement project, to using productivity to earn your self-respect, to confusing emotional isolation with confidence, this episode is for the person who is exhausted from trying to optimize themselves into feeling worthy. If you’ve ever felt like: your self-worth disappears when you’re unproductive you can’t stop “fixing” yourself rest makes you feel guilty healing has started to feel like a full-time job you only like yourself when you’re doing everything right …this episode is probably going to hit harder than you expected. This isn’t about becoming your “best self.” It’s about finally stopping the daily behaviors that make you feel like you’re never enough in the first place.

Your loyalty is preventing you from being honest with yourself | Confessions of a Wellish Girly

This week’s episode is for the people who are exhausted from abandoning themselves in the name of being “good,” loyal, understanding, forgiving, or easy to love. This wasn’t a normal rut. It wasn’t “if I fixed my routine” or “if my life looked different.” It was deeper than that. It was the kind of spiral that makes you question your entire existence and whether you’re even lovable as a person. In therapy this week, I realized I’ve spent years stuck between two values: honesty and loyalty. And almost every time, I chose loyalty even when it meant betraying myself. Today we’re talking about what happens when two core values collide, why breaking old patterns can feel guilty instead of empowering, and how to tell the difference between being selfish and finally being honest. If you’ve ever called yourself “loyal to a fault,” this episode might explain why you feel so emotionally stuck.

You don’t actually hate yourself, you’re stuck in evaluation mode

If you’ve ever thought “why am I like this?” “why can’t I just get it together?” or felt like no matter what you do, it’s never enough this episode is going to hit. Because what if you don't actually hate yourself? What if you’ve just been grading yourself your entire life, scoring your body, your productivity, your emotions, your progress, against standards you didn’t even consciously choose? In this episode, we’re unpacking the subtle but exhausting habit of turning your life into a performance review and why it’s the real reason you feel like you’re always falling short. You’ll learn: Why “self-hatred” is often just constant self-evaluation How you unknowingly built your internal grading system Why you never feel good enough (even when you’re doing well) How to stop living like a report card and start actually experiencing your life Simple, realistic ways to build self-worth that isn’t based on performance This is your reminder that you’re not behind, broken, or not doing enough. You’ve just been measuring yourself in a way that makes it impossible to ever feel like you pass.

What your day to day life says about you

In this episode, we’re getting real about what your daily life actually says about you because your habits, routines, and patterns aren’t random!!!! They’re a reflection of what you believe you deserve, what you prioritize, and where you might be a little out of alignment. If you’ve been feeling like you’re “failing” your routine or lifestyle, constantly starting over, or trying to keep up with habits that look good online but feel impossible in real life, this episode is your reset. We’re talking about: why you’re probably being way too hard on yourself how your life might be more performative than aligned the subtle ways social media is shaping a routine that doesn’t actually fit your life and how to build a lifestyle that actually feels good to live, not just one that looks good This isn’t about fixing yourself. It’s about finally understanding yourself, so you can build a life that feels like yours. Because a Wellish life isn’t perfect. It’s human, repeatable, and livable.

April Hates & Favs: Emotional Reactions, Abandonment Issues & Needing Reassurance | Confessions of a Wellish Girly

This is your reminder that self-improvement doesn’t look like having it all together, it looks like paying attention and getting to know yourself on a deeper level. In this week’s Confessions of a Wellish Girly, I’m breaking down what actually worked for me in April and what didn’t. From the small habits that quietly kept my mental health afloat, to the patterns that still trip me up (hi reassurance + abandonment wounds!!!!), this episode is a real look at what growth actually feels like in real life. We’re talking: the truth about movement + mental health why “not self-abandoning” feels uncomfortable at first the difference between emotional reactions vs clarity what’s shifting for me in relationships, routines, and career pressure and the little things that made life feel so much better this month If you’re in a season of figuring yourself out, softening your standards, and trying to build a life that actually feels good (not just looks good) this one’s for you. Items discussed: Sweet Water Decor Self Care Candle: https://amzn.to/4e7OPlJ Lilac Yankee Candle: https://amzn.to/3P19kpS Micellar Clensing Water with Salicylic Acid: https://amzn.to/3P1fCWv Geeneiya Venus Lash Clusters: https://amzn.to/4mOWB69 Attached by Amir Levine, M.D., and Rachel S.F. Heller, M.A.: https://amzn.to/4u6gE2e

The pressure to do it all is ruining your life with Brian Pultro

Somewhere along the way, we started believing that for our lives to be good enough they have to be full. Full schedules. Full calendars. Full routines. Full potential. So we keep adding more. More goals, more habits, more plans, thinking eventually it will feel like enough. But what if the problem isn’t that you’re not doing enough, it’s that your life is overpacked? In this episode, I sit down with Brian Pultro, former Navy Commander turned financial planner, to unpack why so many of us feel the need to fill every inch of our lives in order to feel worthy, productive, or “on track.” We talk about the pressure to do it all, why slowing down feels uncomfortable (even unsafe), and his philosophy of “monk speed,” a more intentional, grounded way of living that prioritizes presence over pressure. Because a life that looks full isn’t the same as a life that feels full. If you’ve been chasing the feeling of “enough” by trying to do more, this episode will help you rethink what actually makes a life feel good to live.

The truth no one tells you about resetting your life

If you’re trying to reset your life right now and instead of feeling better you feel uncomfortable, disconnected, or like something is off, this episode is for you. Because the truth no one tells you is that starting over doesn’t feel empowering at first. It feels unfamiliar. It feels like: being misunderstood when you stop people pleasing questioning yourself when things finally get calm missing chaos even when you know it wasn’t good for you not fully recognizing your own life yet In this episode, we’re getting into the real experience of resetting your life. Not the aesthetic version, but the emotional, identity-shifting, slightly uncomfortable version that actually leads to change. We’re talking about why peace can feel wrong, why people may not like the new version of you, and how to stay grounded when you’re in that in-between phase where nothing feels fully right yet. If you’ve ever thought, “why doesn’t this feel as good as I thought it would?” you’re not doing it wrong. You’re just changing.

Q&A: Trust issues, fake habits, & feeling behind | Confessions of a Wellish Listener

Today’s episode is for anyone who feels like they’re doing life “wrong” even though they’re trying. In this Confessions of a Wellish Listener episode, I’m reading your real, unfiltered thoughts from judging your life based on other people’s expectations, to assuming the worst in every situation, to feeling happy for the first time in a while and immediately waiting for it to fall apart. We’re talking about: why you don’t trust your life yet (and what to do about it) the difference between intuition and fear why your “healthy habits” aren’t sticking what it actually means when you outgrow your friends and why your life might feel off simply because you’re not actually enjoying it If you’ve ever felt behind, disconnected, or like you’re secretly not as put together as you “should” be this episode will make you feel seen and help you start thinking about your life differently. Because maybe nothing is wrong with you!!!! You’re just in the middle of becoming someone new.

How to build a life that feels good with Terri Hanson Mead

If you’ve been trying to build a better life but keep getting stuck in perfectionism, pressure, or routines that feel more forced than fulfilling, this episode is for you. This week, I’m joined by Terri Hanson Mead, reinvention advocate, helicopter pilot, and author of Piloting Your Life, for a conversation about what it actually looks like to change your life in a real way through the choices you make every day. We talk about burnout, people-pleasing, external validation, the “messy middle” of change, and how to start building a lifestyle that feels good to live instead of one that just looks good on paper. We also get into micro-changes, experimenting with your life, how to stop quitting every time you miss a habit, and why the goal isn’t perfection, but intention. This episode is for anyone who feels like their life is fine but not fully theirs yet and wants to start changing that in a way that’s realistic, freeing, and actually sustainable. CONNECT WITH TERRI! ⤵️ 📚 Book: Piloting Your Life 📹 YouTube: Terri Hanson Mead 📰 Newsletter: PYL In-Flight Entertainment 🎙 Podcast: Piloting Your Life 📰 Medium Blog: Medium: Terri Hanson Mead 💻 Social: Websites: terrihansonmead.com + pilotingyourlife.com Instagram: @terrihansonmead + @pilotingyourlife LinkedIn: Terri Hanson Mead Facebook: Terri Hanson Mead TikTok: Terri Hanson Mead 🔥Retreats: Piloting Your Life Retreats 🧭✈️❤️Zeke and Terri Adventures

You don’t need a perfect routine you need one you’ll actually repeat

You plan the perfect routine, you feel so motivated, you tell yourself this is the one that’s going to change your life and then life happens. You get busy, tired, off your game for a day and suddenly you’re back at square one, wondering why you can’t stay consistent. But what if the problem isn’t you? What if the problem is that you’ve been trying to follow routines that only work when your life is perfect? In this episode, we’re reframing everything you’ve been taught about routines. Because you don’t need something optimized, aesthetic, or “ideal”you need something you can actually repeat. Something that works on your worst days, not just your best ones. We’re talking about why perfect routines fail, how to build a routine that fits your real life, and the identity shift that actually makes consistency feel natural instead of forced. If you’re tired of all-or-nothing habits and ready for something that actually sticks this one’s for you.

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