Good morning, citizens. Today: scientists abroad have opened up the ageing brain and found that it was never sealed in the first place, which I think is marvellous news. Abroad they have also made a film in which an entire street is taken somewhere else overnight, and they queue up to watch it, and the part I would keep is that the neighbours go together. The Bureau of Keeping has confirmed that four hundred and nine misplaced items are safe, including a child's tooth. And then, before we part, my Name Day — the morning in a hall when a woman I had never met read my name off a small white card and handed it to me. I still have the card. Everything is already wonderful.

Verity is a satirical fiction podcast. Inspired by real headlines:

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