Stop Parenting & Start Coaching

Stop Parenting & Start Coaching

by Nate Crandall and Steve Galley

Self-Improvement Parenting

Parents! Ever Parked Like a Banana?

CLICKBAIT WARNING! What do guinea pigs and perpendicular parking have to do with parenting a teenaged athlete or performer?! Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?! and... Have you ever parked like a banana? Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh?! OK, let's unpeel this banana and straighten up those guinea pigs between the lines or in other words, let's figure out how this one weird little perpendicular parking trick will help you to strengthen your connections with your teen and elevate your parental communication skills! Listen in to the latest episode of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast and we'll make sense of this nonsense! Final thought, Parental Units--you are doing better than you think and your kids are counting on you. Believe in them. Respect them. Guide them. Trust them. Transform your relationship with them, TODAY. Catch you next week with another episode of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching* Podcast. We drop every Monday. -Nate & Steve P.S. We believe in your parenting (and your perpendicular parking, too)!

Yikes! That Would Be Really Awkward & Scary!

What in the wide world of sports is "positional intimidation" and how does it effect your teen athlete or performer? And what is "pupification?!" Ok, the second term was created purely in jest but the first term is real and almost every teen will find themself facing it at some point in their playing or performing journey. Perspective and preparation will help them lower the stress and apprehension that often accompanies this scary situation! What situation? We're talking about your teen approaching an "intimidating" coach, director, advisor, teacher, or leader. Yikes! This can be difficult, but it doesn't have to be. Let's skill up! In this episode of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast we do not dance around this tough situation for teens and parents. Let's find out when and how to approach these crazy, intimidating coaches by focusing on a few important things: Why getting to the truth is critical Methods for getting to the truth by conversing with your coach Questions to consider that really work A gold mine role playing tip for parents and teens Why timing can help dial down the pressure and ramp up growth Very Important Parents--we hope you have gained some helpful insights to help you confidently guide your teen to confidently approach their coach! We hope you will discuss those insights with your spouse or partner and most importantly, with your teen athlete or performer! If you love this episode, please share it with a friend and if you love it as much as a fluffy puppy, we'd love it if you gave us a 5 star review and/or leave a helpful review so others may more easily find us as we continue to grow--thanks! And please remember, we're cheering you on moms and dads--you're doing better than you think! - Nate & Steve

What if My Coach DOESN'T Hate Me?

Last week in Episode #30 of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast we explored the "My Coach Hates Me" situation and in today's episode (#31) we stick our hands in the same hornet's nest, but now from a coach's perspective. In fact, speaking on "perspective", our goal is to encourage you as a Most Valuable Parent to entertain the idea of creating a perspective shift in this difficult situation. By doing so, you position yourself to help your teen to learn the best way(s) to turn this not very fun situation into a positive experience. We all have blind spots (performers/parents/coaches) and becoming aware of those blind spots and then viewing things in a fresh, different, (and calm) manner can pay big dividends now and in the long term. Let's all experience a grand perspective shift! Thanks for being here--we hope you gain something valuable from this time we spend together!! We LOVE the feedback and/or questions you send us at createtransformbecome@gmail.com. We'd be honored to discuss your "parenting your athlete/performer question/crisis/issue" on an upcoming episode. We drop new ones every MONDAY! What's on your parenting mind? Send it to us today! -Nate & Steve

My Coach Hates Me! What Now, Parents?

"My coach hates me!" Is this a thing? Oh, it's a thing and it's not fun for player or parent (or coach, either). Ouch, this one hurts! "My coach hates me!" is a common refrain from performing teens the world over! So parents, how do we handle this difficult situation? How would you (or do you) deal with this fragile moment that borders on opportunity for learning and a full on train wreck?! We don't claim to have all of the answers but we do have some gems for you today on navigating the whole "My coach hates me" thing. On The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast today we bust into a spontaneous role play between parent (Nate) and teen (Steve) which we think and believe will be useful for you and your talented teen. Our goal? To help you as a parent up your game in this situation so that you can help your son or daughter to learn and grow through an appropriate perspective shift. This is an prime example of a parent (Nate) who "stops parenting" and "starts coaching" and will create much better results than you hopping on The Misery Train or diving into Fix It Right Now gear. You can do this (the "start coaching" thing)! Are you ready for some excellent inquiry, gold nugget references to some titans in the personal development world (and their excellent work!), and some tasty apple turnovers, too?! Let's go! Enjoy! We also LOVE the feedback and/or questions you send to us at createtransformbecome@gmail.com. We'd be honored to discuss your "parenting your athlete/performer question/crisis/issue" on an upcoming episode. We drop new ones every MONDAY! Moms/Dads--we want you to elevate your parenting. You CAN do this if you "Stop Parenting & Start Coaching" your superstar teen! You are doing better than you think and your teen athlete or performer is counting on you. Let's goooooooo! -Nate & Steve

Parents! Don't Miss the Starting Gun!

The opening line for today's show was about sunshine but we must tell you it was sooooooo cold in the studio today--downright frigid! But, we warmed up quickly creating this episode of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast for you. We hope you love it and find it useful. What do BHAG's, Pink Floyd, Steve Chandler, qualifying for the Boston Marathon and "moving futures" have to do with your parenting and coaching? Listen in to find out as we explore all of the above and specifically the following: --the importance of managing expectations by using a moving future -- learning to use a balanced goal approach to model chasing your own goals and dreams --why it is important for us as parents to have BHAG's and then adjust and adapt appropriately as we pursue them? --what is a real life example of chasing a BHAG? --what are some practical applications of the balanced goal approach? And, we'll wrap it all up in Creation Corner where we will challenge you to thoughtfully and carefully answer these two important questions: --What will you create with your remaining time? --Who do you have to be to inspire your teen athlete or performer? It is your time to shine parents and as you do, you will be modeling great behavior for your teen athletes/performers. Let's do this (whatever you're BHAG is!) And while you're here, would you please share it and/or this episode with a parent friend who could benefit as well. We do this for you and cannot do it without you. We would love a 5 star review from you if we are deserving of such! We also LOVE the feedback and/or questions you send to us at createtransformbecome@gmail.com. We'd be honored to discuss your "parenting your athlete/performer question/crisis/issue" on an upcoming episode. We drop new ones every MONDAY! Moms/Dads--we want you to elevate your parenting. You CAN do this if you "Stop Parenting & Start Coaching" your superstar teen! You are doing better than you think and your teen athlete or performer is counting on you. Let's goooooooo! -Nate & Steve

Parents--What if You Don't Feel Like "Trusting the Process?"

In the high performance coaching pool that we swim in, the phrase "trust the process" is mentioned every 3.8 seconds (ok, maybe an exaggeration there!). But...what if we get stuck on or in our feelings and "trusting the process" is not very attractive in the moment? Motivation is easy uh well, when it's easy! :) But what about when it's not? In today's episode of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast we continue our BHAG (big, hairy audacious goal--thank you Jim Collins), resolutions, and generally "go make things happen" 2024 conversation that we began in Episode 26 ("You Don't Need No Stinkin' Resolutions!"). We hit on the balanced goal approach, which is our way of describing the overall strategy of "trusting the process," as we strive to achieve our short and long term goals. Here are just a few of the gold nuggets you'll find here today: --What is the real battle in taking the balanced goal approach? --Why should we model this behavior as a parent (rather than just telling them)? --Why is discipline more important than motivation and how to win the battles within the moment? --How do we accelerate progress? --The Nick Booth jump hook story! --What are the common pitfalls we face when trying to trust the process? --What is the "sweet spot" when trying to stretch yourself in attacking a goal?! --And to finish up, a Parental Unit challenge is issued (besides the ongoing challenge for you to share The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast with 3 of your friends--if you love it, of course, and if you are benefitting from it! The challenge: What can you do TODAY to upgrade your relationship with your teen athlete or performer? Trust the Process and make it happen moment by moment! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hey there Very Important Parents! We resolve to up our game in 2024 as we strive to create a world-class podcast for parents of teen athletes and performers! Please hit the follow button where ever you find us (Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts--while it lasts, and even on YouTube). New episodes drop every Monday. We would love it and be so grateful if you posted a glowing 5 star review along with a helpful comment for other listeners on what you are learning (and hopefully incorporating) from the show. After all, we created it just for you and as always, moms and dads, we're cheering you on as you Stop Parenting & Start Coaching! -Nate & Steve

The TRANSFORMING Stress Series: Parents, Are You Falling into this Trap?!

Welcome back to The Stop Parenting and Start Coaching Podcast! And a hearty welcome to any new listeners--thanks for being here! In the third and final episode of The TRANSFORMING Stress Series, we hit on an absolutely critical subject! The all important, absolutely necessary process of creating your definition of success (for you and helping your teen athlete or performer to create their own). Here's a look at what you'll find in this episode: - The "story of humanity" or the quest we perpetually chase - The traps we continually fall into as athletes and parents - How can you transform the stress associated with these pesky traps? - What can you do as a superstar parent to create alignment with your teen relative - A summary of all three episodes in The TRANSFORMING Stress Series and an exciting challenge for you Most Valuable Parents! If you love what you are LEARNING & LISTENING to here, please share it and/or this episode with a parent friend who could benefit as well. We do this for you and cannot do it without you. We would as they say, love, love, love a 5 star review from you if we are deserving! We are constantly working on our game to create a world-class podcast! New episodes drop every Monday. We also LOVE the feedback or questions sent to us at createtransformbecome@gmail.com. Let's hear from YOU!! Keep them coming! We'd be honored to discuss your "parenting your athlete/performer question/crisis/issue" on an upcoming episode. Moms/Dads--we've got your back as you Stop Parenting & Start Coaching your superstar teen! By leveling up your parent game, your teen athlete or performer is much more likely to follow your lead and elevate their performance. Let's goooooooo! -Nate & Steve

Parents--You Don't Need No Stinking Resolutions!

It's January 1. Do you know where your resolutions are? Hopefully in the garbage! Wait, what? Did we just say that?! Uh, yeah we did. Btw, thanks for joining us for the first episode of The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast in 2024! It's time to bang your pots and pans and light off some fireworks! Happy New Year!! It's also time to: --exercise more often --lose that unwanted weight --read 1 book a week --eat clean --start a new hobby --get out of debt --share The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast with 2,024 of your friends C'mon, that sounds like another New Year's resolutions list. Yaaaawwwn. You're gonna fall off the wagon and we can predict approximately when that will happen (you gotta listen in to find out). It's sooner than you think. Ugh. On a serious note moms & dads--if you are all fired up for 2024 and have your New Year's resolutions posted, please don't tear them up or burn them! But, we do encourage you to open your mind for a few minutes and lean in or listen in to our discussion on goals, "resolve", and a perhaps a better way to approach a brand stinkin' new year as a parent who wants to get better. Join us for an intriguing conversation on why it may be a really good thing to challenge the traditional notion that January 1 is prime time for resolutions! We think you'll enjoy having your thinking challenged and we hope you love what we have dialed up for you in Creation Corner. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hey there Most Valuable Parents! We resolve to up our game in 2024 as we strive to create a world-class podcast for parents of teen athletes and performers! Hit the follow button where ever you find us (Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts--while it lasts, and even on YouTube). New episodes drop every Monday. We would super love it if you gave us a 5 star review along with a brief comment on what you are gaining from our show. Much thanks! Programming note: we will wrap up The TRANSFORMING Stress Series with a firecracker when we explore the extremely important "__________________." Tune in to Episode 27 to find out what goes in the blank! Moms/Dads--we're cheering you on this week and THIS BRAND NEW YEAR as you Stop Parenting & Start Coaching your superstar teen! You are doing better than you think and your teen athlete or performer is counting on you. Let's goooooooo! -Nate & Steve

The TRANSFORMING Stress Series: Parents--Switching Lenses to Shift Perspective!

Greetings to any new listeners and welcome back to those who've been onboard with us at The Stop Parenting and Start Coaching Podcast! In the second episode of The TRANSFORMING Stress Series, we bring some glass cleaner and wipe the egocentrism off our parental eyeglasses! This one is all about seeing things from your teen's perspective. Here is a quick peek at what you'll find inside this episode: --Would you ever deprive a two year-old of a nap in an effort to prepare him or her to for elementary school? Huh?! --Hair, cars, and music...the good stuff! --Grades, grades, grades...oh boy, here we go again! --Sleep and HS start times...don't get us started on this one! And. we finish up with some great questions to ask your teens to help you switch lenses and shift your perspective! What an opportunity you have to grow and strengthen your relationship with these! Nourish those conversations! If you love what you are LEARNING & LISTENING to here, please share it and/or this episode with a parent friend who could benefit as well. We do this for you and cannot do it without you. We would as they say, love, love, love a 5 star review from you if we are deserving! We are constantly working on our game to create a world-class podcast! New episodes drop every Monday. We also LOVE the feedback or questions sent to us at createtransformbecome@gmail.com. Let's hear from YOU!! We'd be honored to discuss your "parenting your athlete/performer question/crisis/issue" on an upcoming episode. And, speaking of upcoming episodes, we will soon wrap up The TRANSFORMING Stress Series with a bang as we explore the extremely critical "__________________." Tune in to find out what that is! Moms/Dads--we're cheering you on this week as you Stop Parenting & Start Coaching your superstar teen! You are doing better than you think and your teen athlete or performer is counting on you. Let's goooooooo! -Nate & Steve

The TRANSFORMING Stress Series: Parents, You Lead the Way!

Welcome to the Transforming Stress Series on The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast! In the first of three empowering episodes, we delve into the crucial topic of stress transformation. You, the Very Important Parent, play a crucial role in modeling leading the way for your teen athlete or performer. Your teen is watching you and how you deal with the big "S" word. Stress. YIKES! And, we know it's tough. Often it is harder for you as a parent to watch your teen in a pressure cooker situation than it is for them to perform! You know what we're talking about here! A common phrase in the personal development/mental health/sport psychology worlds is "stress management." We push back against that phrase in this episode. We confidently and resolutely view stress as something that cannot be eliminated. We view ever present stress as a wonderful opportunity for transformation rather than management! We hope you enjoy the stories from Steve as young athlete and Nate as a sports dad as we illustrate what it means to transform stress into something amazing and helpful. Speaking of that, how do you change or transform stress into a positive force for good? How do we model appropriate stress transformation for our teens? Here is a great place to start. Answer this gem from Nate: What do you really want for you teen out of their performance experiences? Your honest answer will be insightful and will likely help you shape your behavior in a way that will help your teen to transform stress in effective ways. You got this moms and dads! Thanks for listening! We hope to have your ears and attention in the next episode as well where we continue our discussion of transforming stress with an emphasis on the mighty role of "perspective." If you love The Stop Parenting & Start Coaching Podcast, please follow us and share with two or three of your Parental Unit tribe! We'd also love a 5 star review on Apple or Spotify--it will help us grow and improve! And if you're into the whole socials thing you can follow us at createtransformbecome on Instagram and Facebook. Until next time, GO PARENTS! -Nate & Steve

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