Welcome back to America’s Loudest Podcast, where we open the show literally waving guns around on camera and somehow that’s not even the most unhinged part of the hour. 

We go from “I sleep next to a gun on the couch just in case” to debating poop knives like they’re a legitimate household tool. 

Somewhere between declaring ourselves America’s fattest podcast, talking about poop particles on your toothbrush, and deciding whether having sex with a blow-up doll of yourself is “gay” or “gay as fuck,”…

Then we slide into Florida-or-Not madness: school board creeps calling underage girls “hot,” arson over macaroni and cheese, attic meth goblins falling through ceilings, and a McDonald’s cookie heist on Easter because of course it was. 

Ian drops his very biased Top 10 Power Ballads list a ...