You've found yourself surrounded by the most battle-hardened pikemen of Never Better, a show that's never going to get any better. Surrender now, listener, in the name of the Emperor, or you shall not live to see the sunset.

This week, Craig, Spencer, and Michael discuss telephone etiquette, the recent salmon unpleasantness, grandpa tipping, General Booty, impassioned monologues, worrisome octopus behavior, and coworker dreams. Also, we take our first ever on-air caller, which goes about how you'd probably expect.

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