Who Told You That: Faith, Feelings & the Fear of Being “Too Much”
In this week’s conversation, I sit down with my friend Kelli to talk about what we jokingly call being “toxically open” – oversharing, social hangovers, and that next-day spiral where you replay every word and wonder if you were “too much.” We explore how shame sneaks into our relationships, what it looks like to build safe community, and why the simple question “Who told you that?” can be such a game-changer for our view of ourselves and God. We also get into what it means to invite Jesus into our actual stories (not the cleaned-up versions), why many of us learned to intellectualize our feelings to survive, and how practices like silence, solitude, and “coffee with Jesus” can help us reconnect with our own hearts. Along the way, there’s talk of therapy, faith, IFS parts language, the gospel ladder, and finding little “taste like sugar” moments even in hospital waiting rooms. In this episode, we talk about: • Living “toxically open” & the social vulnerability hangover• Shame, self-abandonment, and learning we don’t have to shrink to be loved• Differentiating God’s voice from the voice of shame: Who told you that?• Intellectualizing feelings vs. actually feeling them (hi, fellow robots)• Community, safe people, and showing up for each other in the muddle If you’ve ever left a hangout thinking, “Was I way too much?” or wondered how God could really love the real you, this one’s for you.
