What if the very patterns you use to feel safe in a relationship are the same ones keeping you stuck? When I sat down with Ayla Fleming, LCSW, LCADC — a trauma-informed therapist that’s the question we unpacked in this week’s powerful episode of Love and Trauma: The Real Deal. Ayla isn’t just an expert in the field… she’s lived it. Ayla grew up in a household shaped by addiction, anxiety, and emotional chaos. Like so many of us, she learned early on to become the strong one, the peacekeeper, the overfunctioner. And just like me — she brought those patterns straight into her adult relationships, thinking they were a form of love. Together, we opened up about our journeys through codependency, dysregulation, and what it really takes to build a healthy, mutual relationship after trauma has rewired the way you connect.

Watch Full Ep ...