Loud & Lifted

Loud & Lifted

di Betsy Hamm
Lavoro
Stagione 2
The Good Girl Rules You’re Allowed to Break
Esplicito
So many women were taught to be nice, helpful, agreeable and easy to work with. Those qualities aren’t bad—but they become a problem when they keep us quiet, overextended or afraid to disappoint anyone. In this Quick Lift, Betsy recaps her conversation with Michelle Minnikin about “Good Girl” conditioning, why people may resist when we begin to change, and how to set boundaries without believing we’ve become cold, difficult or selfish. Links Full episode with Michelle Connect with Michelle Minnikin
S2 · E77
24 set 2026
10:15
Deprogramming the Good Girl with Michelle Minnikin
Esplicito
Were you taught to be nice, helpful, agreeable and easy to work with—only to end up overworked, undervalued and quietly resentful? In this episode, Betsy talks with psychologist, coach and Good Girl Deprogramming author Michelle Minnikin about the conditioning that teaches women to put everyone else first. They unpack how it follows us into the workplace, why traditional career advice often fails women and how being the “good girl” can eventually hold us back. Michelle also explains why resentment is one of the clearest signs that a boundary has been crossed, how to begin changing these patterns through small experiments and what it really means to enter your villain era—without becoming someone you’re not. You’ll learn: How good-girl conditioning shows up at work Why being capable and agreeable can lead to more work, but not more opportunity How to recognize when your boundaries are being crossed Why resentment is an important signal instead of something to ignore How to practice setting boundaries in small, realistic ways Why visibility and self-promotion aren’t selfish What it means to become comfortable with being disliked Learn more about Michelle and find her book, Good Girl Deprogramming, at michelleminnikin.com. Chapters 00:00 What “Good Girl” Conditioning Teaches Us 04:06 How Good Girls Show Up at Work 08:23 Deprogramming Starts with Small Steps 12:01 Resentment Is a Boundary Warning Sign 14:20 Experimenting with Boundaries 17:45 When Competence Turns You into the Worker Bee 21:10 Entering Your Villain Era 24:12 Becoming “Unfuckwithable” 25:11 Why “Let Them” Isn’t Always Enough 27:18 Who Pushes Back When Women Change 29:38 One Practice to Begin Deprogramming 31:20 Where to Connect with Michelle
S2 · E76
17 set 2026
32:35
Stop Carrying What Doesn’t Need to Be Yours
Episode Overview: If you’re the person everyone relies on, it can start to feel completely normal to carry way too much. In this Quick Lift, I’m breaking down the biggest takeaways from my conversation with Cherylanne Skolnicki about the peak of complexity, why capable women become the default person at work and at home, and how to start changing that without lowering your ambition or your standards. You’ll learn: Why your old way of managing life may not work anymore How to spot the invisible load taking up your time, energy and headspace Why “I can do this” is different from “I should do this” The four things that make letting go hard: guilt, FOMO, judgment and control How to think about delegation differently Why a real boundary is something you can uphold The question to ask yourself: Am I uniquely qualified to do this? The goal is not to overhaul your whole life. It’s to start getting more intentional about what actually needs to stay yours. Full episode with Cherylanne
S2 · E75
10 set 2026
8:23
You Built a Bigger Life. Now You Need a Different Way to Run It.
At some point, being the woman who can handle everything stops feeling impressive and starts feeling exhausting. In this episode, I’m talking with Cherylanne Skolnicki, founder of Brilliant Balance, about what she calls the peak of complexity—that season when your career is demanding more, your family is demanding more, your ambition is still very much alive…and your available capacity is basically gone. We talk about why the same operating system that helped us climb professionally eventually stops working, why so many women become the default person for everyone and everything, and why letting go can bring up guilt, judgment, FOMO and a whole lot of control issues. Cherylanne also shares practical ways to start changing the pattern—without lowering your standards, losing your ambition or waiting for life to magically calm down. You’ll learn: Why successful women hit a “peak of complexity” How to rethink your week when there’s no time left over for you The four emotions that make letting go so hard A better way to think about boundaries Why delegation usually feels harder before it gets easier How to decide what actually needs to be yours The question: “Am I uniquely qualified to do this?” If you’ve built the career, the family and the full life—and you’re wondering why it still feels like too much—this one is for you. Chapters 01:05 The Gen X Promise of “Having It All” 04:10 Why Cherylanne Left the Corporate Ladder 11:35 The Complexity Curve 14:30 When the Way You’ve Always Operated Stops Working 17:05 The Peak of Complexity 19:40 Why You Need a New Operating System 21:20 Treat Your Week Like Your Life in Miniature 24:15 Put Yourself Into the Week First 27:25 Becoming the Default Person for Everyone 29:15 Guilt, FOMO, Judgment and Control 31:55 Boundaries Other People May Not Like 34:25 Delegating Without Lowering Your Standards 36:25 Small Experiments That Create More Capacity 38:05 No One Is Coming to Save You Links Take this quiz: Discover What's Standing Between You and Where You Want to Be Brilliant Balance Instagram: Brilliant Balance Instagram: Cherylanne
S2 · E74
3 set 2026
38:59
Perimenopause Is Not a Career Decline: What to Know and What to Do
You are exhausted. You cannot sleep. Your anxiety feels higher. Your focus is off. And suddenly you are wondering why things that used to feel manageable now seem so much harder. It might be stress. But what if it is not just stress? In this Quick Lift, Betsy shares the key takeaways from her conversation with Dr. Caissa Troutman about perimenopause, leadership and why women can mistakenly interpret very real symptoms as a loss of capability. This is not a medical deep dive. It is the girlfriend version of what women need to know: what to pay attention to, why brain fog and poor sleep can affect confidence at work, when to seek support and why powering through is not always the answer. You’ll learn: Why perimenopause symptoms are so easily mistaken for stress or burnout How poor sleep, anxiety and brain fog can affect confidence and credibility at work Why perimenopause often collides with some of women’s biggest career years Why “normal” does not mean you have to suffer What to pay attention to when something suddenly feels different How to find a provider who understands perimenopause Why you should get curious before deciding you are losing your edge How to think about support at work without feeling like you need to disclose everything Perimenopause is common. It can affect your career. And it does not mean you are becoming less capable. Links Listen to the full episode Connect with Dr. Troutman
S2 · E73
27 ago 2026
9:04
You’re Not Losing Your Edge: Perimenopause, Work and the Pressure to Power Through
Perimenopause often arrives during the exact years women are leading teams, running businesses, pursuing promotions and managing enormous responsibilities at work and at home. But many women do not recognize what is happening. They blame the anxiety on stress. The exhaustion on their schedule. The 3:00 a.m. wake-ups on everything running through their minds. And because they are not having hot flashes, they dismiss perimenopause as a possible explanation. In this episode, Betsy sits down with Dr. Caissa Troutman, a physician specializing in menopause and midlife health—and Betsy’s own doctor—to talk about how perimenopause can affect sleep, focus, confidence, credibility and career decisions. They explore the difference between perimenopause and menopause, the symptoms women commonly miss and why women are so often told that what they are experiencing is simply stress or aging. Dr. Troutman also shares the treatment options available, including hormone therapy, nutrition, movement, stress support and individualized medical care. This is not about women becoming less capable. It is about understanding what is happening before women—or the people around them—mistake it for decline. You’ll learn: How perimenopause differs from menopause Why anxiety, fatigue, sleep disruption and brain fog are commonly overlooked symptoms How perimenopause can affect confidence and credibility at work Why women often blame themselves and try to power through How untreated symptoms can influence promotions, leadership opportunities and career decisions Why hormone therapy may help some women but is not the only option What to look for in a provider who understands menopause care Why there is no medal for suffering through a normal biological transition Perimenopause is common. It is okay to talk about it. And there are solutions. Chapters 0:00 — Why Perimenopause Belongs in a Leadership Conversation 1:40 — What Perimenopause Actually Is3:55 — The Symptoms Women Don’t Expect 7:55 — What’s Happening With Your Hormones 9:05 — “I Thought It Was Just Stress” 13:20 — Brain Fog, Confidence & the Career Credibility Hit 15:45 — Should You Talk About Perimenopause at Work? 19:20 — How to Know When It’s Time to Get Help 22:05 — What to Do If Your Doctor Dismisses You 24:00 — The Career Cost of Untreated Symptoms 25:45 — HRT and Other Treatment Options 27:10 — Meals, Movement, Mind & Meds 31:10 — Stop Powering Through & Start Prioritizing Yourself 33:00 — Where to Connect With Dr. Troutman Links Connect with Dr. Troutman Instagram
S2 · E72
20 ago 2026
34:02
Stop Abandoning Yourself in the Small Moments
Silencing yourself does not always mean staying quiet. Sometimes it means agreeing when you have a different opinion, putting everyone else’s needs ahead of your own or becoming so focused on keeping everything running that you lose touch with what you think and want. In this Quick Lift, Betsy shares the key takeaways from her conversation with Elaine Lin Hering and practical ways to begin rebuilding your voice. You’ll learn: • The subtle ways women silence themselves • Two questions that can help you reconnect with what you think and need • Why your perspective becomes more valuable as you advance in your career • How to speak up through small, low-risk experiments • A simple phrase for disagreeing without creating unnecessary conflict • How to clearly tell people what support looks like for you You do not need to change your entire life or become the loudest person in the room. You can start by no longer abandoning yourself in the small moments. Links: Elaine Lin Hering Purchase Unlearning Silence Listen to the full episode with Elaine
S2 · E71
13 ago 2026
10:34
Why So Many Successful Women Lose Their Voice
What if you are not struggling to speak up because you lack confidence—but because you have spent years learning to stay silent? Elaine Lin Hering, author of Unlearning Silence, joins Betsy to explore how women withhold their opinions, needs, goals and emotions to make life easier for everyone around them. That silence may earn you a reputation as agreeable, helpful and easy to work with, but it can also leave you feeling overlooked, exhausted and disconnected from who you are. Elaine shares why women often lose touch with what they think and need, how narrow expectations around leadership and executive presence silence talented people, and why your perspective becomes one of your greatest professional assets as you advance. You’ll learn: How learned silence shows up beyond simply staying quiet Why women are often rewarded for being agreeable and easy to work with How narrow definitions of leadership and executive presence silence talented people Why your perspective becomes more valuable as you advance in your career Two questions that can help you reconnect with what you think and need How low-risk experiments can help you start using your voice again A simple phrase that can turn potential conflict into conversation Because being loud is not about dominating the room. It is about having the agency to show up fully as yourself. Chapters 00:00 Why Women Learn to Stay Silent 01:50 What “Unlearning Silence” Really Means 05:05 Why We’re Rewarded for Being Easy and Agreeable 07:45 How Workplaces Silence People Without Realizing It 10:16 The Problem With “Executive Presence” 12:03 Start Speaking Up With Low-Risk Experiments 15:24 How to Help Other Women Find Their Voice 16:37 Two Questions: What Do I Think and Need? 17:25 Why Your Perspective Is Your Career Value 19:57 Sharing What You Need Isn’t Selfish 21:06 When High-Achieving Women Lose Themselves 30:31 Voice Is About Choice—not Constantly Talking 31:30 What Being “Loud” Actually Means 32:13 A Simple Phrase for Speaking Up at Work 33:53 Practical Steps to Start Unlearning Silence Links Connect with Elaine Purchase Unlearning Silence
S2 · E70
6 ago 2026
41:08
What to Do When Another Woman Is Undermining You at Work
What should you do when another woman is excluding, undermining, or damaging your confidence at work? In this Quick Lift, Betsy shares the key takeaways and action steps from her conversation with Vanessa Vershaw, author of The Sisterhood Paradox. She explores how to tell the difference between workplace conflict and a repeated pattern of bullying, why women often minimize harmful behavior, and how to get clarity before the situation begins affecting the way you see yourself. Betsy also shares practical ways to document what is happening, seek an objective perspective, evaluate whether the workplace is likely to change, and begin building an exit strategy when necessary. And because this conversation cannot only be about the women who have hurt us, she challenges all of us to look more honestly at how we support, include, compete with, and speak about other women. Real support is not avoiding conflict. It is choosing to handle it differently. Listen to the full episode with Vanessa
S2 · E69
30 lug 2026
10:54
Why Women Undermine Other Women at Work
We talk a lot about the boys’ club. But what happens when the person making work harder for a woman is another woman? In this honest and thought-provoking conversation, Betsy sits down with organizational psychologist, leadership expert, and author Vanessa Vershaw to explore The Sisterhood Paradox—the complicated reality of women undermining, excluding, and sometimes bullying other women at work. Vanessa explains why these experiences are often difficult to recognize and even harder to talk about. She shares the difference between a difficult colleague and a true workplace bully, why exclusion can be one of the most damaging forms of aggression, and what women can do when the person targeting them holds more power. They also discuss why “women supporting women” cannot simply be a slogan, the importance of accountability, and what it will take to build stronger and more honest support systems for women. Because the boys’ club may be real. But women still have work to do to build a stronger girls’ club. Chapters 0:00 What Is the Sisterhood Paradox? 2:10 Why Women Are Afraid to Talk About It 5:29 Why Women Tear Other Women Down 6:16 What Female Bullying Looks Like at 9:06 When “Women Supporting Women” Isn’t Real 11:05 The Personal Cost of Workplace Bullying 14:45 Collaboration Over Competition 16:13 What Drives Mean-Girl Behavior 17:43 Being Difficult vs. Being a Bully 19:25 Exclusion: The Invisible Form of Bullying 20:12 Why Women Still Need to Enter Male-Dominated Rooms 23:05 What to Do When You’re Being Bullied 24:15 When It’s Time to Leave 27:28 Can a Workplace Bully Actually Change? 28:32 The Harsh Reality of Fighting Back Links Vanessa Vershaw Purchase The Sisterhood Paradox
S2 · E68
23 lug 2026
37:03
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