The Confident Woman Podcast | Podcast on RSS.com

The Confident Woman Podcast

The Confident Woman Podcast

by Rachel Brooks

Self-Improvement Christianity

What to Do When Your Life Doesn’t Look Like You Thought It Would

What do you do when the life you’re living looks nothing like the one you thought you would have by now? There comes a point when you can look around and realize that some of the things you thought would be settled aren’t, certain plans didn’t unfold the way you expected, and parts of the life you spent years building don’t feel the same anymore. It can leave you trying to make sense of the distance between where you thought you would be and where you actually are. In this episode of The Confident Woman, Rachel Brooks opens up a conversation about unexpected life changes, midlife transitions, feeling stuck, and what happens when you don’t know exactly what comes next but you’re beginning to believe there could still be another way. The conversation grew out of something Rachel noticed while walking and thinking through the transitions women around her have been talking about: divorce, empty nesting, grief, changing careers, changing bodies, relationships, identity, burnout, isolation, purpose and fulfillment. The circumstances may be different, but the question underneath so many of them is familiar: What do I do when this isn’t the life I thought I would be living? In this episode: Why unmet expectations can carry their own form of grief What happens when today’s circumstances start feeling permanent Why not knowing how something will change doesn’t mean it never can The difference between solving your entire future and allowing yourself to imagine one again How women can lose sight of possibility during long seasons of survival and uncertainty What Proverbs 16:9 reminds us about making plans while trusting God with the steps we cannot see yet This isn’t about blowing up your life or pretending starting over is easy. Sometimes the circumstances keeping us where we are are very real, and there may not be an immediate answer. The shift Rachel is noticing is much smaller: she is beginning to see options again, and right now, options are hope. The question to sit with this week is: What have you stopped allowing yourself to imagine because somewhere along the way you started believing this is simply how your life is going to be? Continue the Conversation: Follow Rachel at @iamrachelbrooks: https://iamrachelbrooks.com/instagram Read the companion essay on Create Your Own Story and subscribe to continue the weekly conversation. https://iamrachelbrooks.com/substack Scripture referenced: Proverbs 16:9

Why Do I Feel Guilty When I Rest?

Why does resting feel uncomfortable even when you finally have time to slow down? You can close the laptop, finish what needed to be done, and finally have an open afternoon in front of you, yet still feel like you should be doing something. When so much of life has been measured by what gets finished, fixed, created, earned, or moved forward, rest can start to feel less like freedom and more like time you should be using better. In this episode of The Confident Woman, Rachel Brooks opens up a conversation about rest guilt, productivity, pressure, and what happens when we become so focused on making a living, building a life, and preparing for what comes next that we forget how to experience the life already happening in front of us. The conversation begins with an ordinary Sunday afternoon and a spontaneous trip to the library after Rachel realized she couldn’t remember the last time she had picked up a novel simply because she wanted to read it. What seemed insignificant became a reminder of how easily the things we once enjoyed can disappear beneath responsibility, urgency, and the constant feeling that there is always something else we should be doing. In this episode: Why stopping work doesn’t automatically shut off the mental to-do list How productivity can become tied to success, progress, and whether time feels “well spent” What happens when creativity, hobbies, and ordinary enjoyment start needing an outcome Why advice to “slow down and be present” can feel disconnected from the responsibilities women are actually carrying How to care about your future without mentally living there all day What Matthew 6:33–34 reminds us about living the day God has actually given us This isn’t a conversation about dropping your responsibilities or pretending the pressure isn’t real. It’s about noticing when being responsible for your life has quietly turned into never allowing yourself to experience it. Rachel leaves you with one question to sit with this week: What part of your life have you quietly postponed until everything else gets figured out? If this episode has you questioning how you're living, and whether the life you're building still reflects what matters most, The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal gives you somewhere to slow down and work through it instead of rushing into the next thing simply because you believe you should be doing more. The Becoming… is an undated, year-long identity planner and journal designed to help you look honestly at where you're, reconnect with who you're and whose you're, and make intentional decisions about the life you're actually building. Start The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal Continue the Conversation: Follow Rachel at @iamrachelbrooks: https://iamrachelbrooks.com/instagram Read the companion essay, “I Think I Forgot How to Just Live,” on Create Your Own Story, and subscribe to continue the weekly conversation. https://iamrachelbrooks.com/substack Listen, subscribe, and share this episode with the woman who feels guilty for resting and has forgotten how to find joy and meaning in the ordinary. SCRIPTURE REFERENCED Matthew 6:33–34

How to Steward Your God-Given Purpose Without Losing Yourself

How do you know if you're faithfully stewarding your God-given purpose or simply putting more pressure on yourself to make it bigger? We hear things like “your pain becomes your purpose” and “your mess becomes your message,” and sometimes that is exactly what God does. He redeems parts of our stories we once wished we could erase and uses them to help someone else feel seen, understood, and less alone. The harder question comes later, when the message starts reaching people, opportunities begin opening, and something that began in obedience becomes something you feel responsible for growing. In this episode of The Confident Woman, Rachel Brooks opens up a deeper conversation about God-given purpose, biblical stewardship, ambition, impact, and what can happen when a calling that is genuinely meaningful slowly becomes tangled with pressure to do more with it. Because wanting to reach more people isn't automatically ego. Wanting your work to grow isn't automatically wrong. The calling can be real, the motive can be good, and you can still reach a point where bigger starts feeling like proof that you're stewarding it well. Rachel explores the difference between playing small and living faithfully, why her perspective changed over the years, In this episode: • Why pain-to-purpose and mess-to-message can be true without requiring every part of your story to become bigger, public, or productive • How a real calling can quietly become pressure when growth, reach, visibility, and opportunity become the way you measure whether you're doing enough • The difference between playing small and recognizing that something doesn't have to become enormous to be significant • Why Rachel hears Josh Wilson's Dream Small differently now than she did when she was first learning to stop shrinking herself • What biblical stewardship changes when you stop asking how big you can make something and start asking what God is actually asking you to do with it • How 1 Peter 4:10 and Matthew 6:33 bring purpose back underneath faithfulness, obedience, and relationship with God One question sits underneath the entire conversation: What does faithful stewardship of what God gave me look like in this season? Because maybe the answer isn't automatically more. Maybe the calling doesn't need to become smaller, but your definition of faithfulness may need to become more honest about what God is actually asking of you now. If this episode has you looking at your own purpose, the pressure surrounding it, and whether the life you're building still reflects what matters most, The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal gives you somewhere to slow down and work through it instead of rushing into the next thing simply because you believe you should be doing more. The Becoming… is an undated, year-long identity planner and journal designed to help you look honestly at where you're, reconnect with who you're and whose you're, and make intentional decisions about the life you're actually building. Start The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal Continue the Conversation: Follow Rachel at @iamrachelbrooks: https://iamrachelbrooks.com/instagram Join Create Your Own Story on Substack: https://iamrachelbrooks.com/substack Listen, subscribe, and share this episode with the woman who knows she has purpose but may be carrying the pressure to constantly prove, grow, or maximize it.

What to Do When Your Old Life No Longer Fits

What happens when you know you’ve changed, the life that used to fit you doesn’t anymore, and you don’t know where this version of you belongs? It can be hard to explain because nothing necessarily had to go wrong. The things that once lit you up may not anymore. Conversations feel different. Relationships change. Dreams you once worked toward can suddenly feel exhausting, and you find yourself somewhere between missing what was and not knowing what comes next. In this episode of The Confident Woman, Rachel Brooks opens up a deeper conversation about identity, grief, belonging, faith, and the loneliness of becoming somebody different when there isn’t one obvious ending you can point to and say, “That’s what happened.” Because sometimes grief isn’t only about losing a person. You can grieve the relationship, the role you played, the life you knew, the future you expected, and even the version of yourself who existed when all of it still felt familiar. But there’s another layer to this when you realize: I know who I am, but I don’t know what I do anymore. In this episode: Why becoming someone different can feel incredibly lonely even when nothing obviously “ended” How grief can change your relationship with yourself, your identity, and the life you once knew Why the things you once wanted may stop feeling like they belong to you What happens when you know who you are but no longer know how to answer, “What do you do?” Why some relationships survive change while others depended on the role you were playing inside them What it means when your soul starts longing for home, safety, belonging, rest, and something softer Why being weary changed the way Rachel understands Matthew 11:28 What trusting God can look like when you don’t know what comes next One question sits underneath the entire conversation: What do you do when the old life doesn’t feel like home anymore, but the new one hasn’t fully taken shape yet? Because maybe you don’t need to force yourself back into a version of your life that no longer fits just because it’s familiar. Maybe part of becoming is getting honest about what has changed, what you’re longing for now, and who you are becoming in the middle of it. If this episode helps you recognize that you’re somewhere in that in-between, The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal gives you somewhere to keep working through it instead of having another realization that gets buried underneath everything else tomorrow. It’s an undated, year-long identity planner and journal designed to help you get honest about where you are, what no longer fits, what matters to you now, and who you’re becoming as you decide what comes next. Start with The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal Continue the Conversation: Follow Rachel at @iamrachelbrooks and join us inside Create Your Own Story on Substack for deeper personal essays, honest conversations, and the stories behind the work. Listen, subscribe, and share this episode with the woman who may be looking around at her life wondering why the things that used to feel like home don’t fit her anymore. Scripture referenced: Matthew 11:28

How to Trust Yourself Again When Your Track Record Is Messy

How do you trust yourself again when part of the reason you don’t trust yourself is because of your own track record? It’s easy to say, “trust yourself,” until you start thinking about the decisions you regret, the promises you didn’t keep, the times you knew better, or how often somebody else’s certainty started feeling safer than your own judgment. In this episode of The Confident Woman, Rachel Brooks opens up a deeper conversation about self-trust, confidence, faith, and what happens when your past starts becoming evidence against who you are now. Because after enough mistakes, disappointments, broken promises, and second-guessing, it’s easy to start wondering if your “picker is off,” if somebody else probably knows better, or if you can really trust yourself to make the next decision. But for a woman of faith, there’s another layer to this: if our ultimate trust belongs to God, what does healthy self-trust actually look like? Rachel explores the tension between seeking wisdom and outsourcing your authority, the difference between learning from a mistake and turning it into an identity, and why confidence doesn’t have to mean knowing you’ll always get it right. Sometimes the deeper work is learning how to make the best decision you can with what you know today while trusting God with what you cannot see. In this episode: How broken promises and second-guessing slowly erode self-trust Why somebody else’s certainty can start feeling safer than your own judgment The difference between receiving wisdom and surrendering your authority What Proverbs 3:5–6 changes about trust, discernment, and confidence How guilt and shame can turn “I got that wrong” into “I can’t trust myself” Why your track record isn’t finished One question sits underneath the entire conversation: Do I become what I’ve done, or do I become who He says I am because of what He did? Because maybe the answer isn’t proving that you’ll never make another wrong decision. Maybe it’s learning how to stop using your past as a permanent verdict on the woman you are becoming. If this episode helps you recognize where you’ve stopped trusting yourself, Becoming The Confident Woman gives you somewhere to keep going with the work instead of having another realization that disappears tomorrow. It’s an eight-week private audio mentorship with Rachel in your ear and a companion workbook to help you see what’s been shaping you, question what no longer fits, and begin making different choices from here. Start Becoming The Confident Woman Continue the Conversation: Follow Rachel at @iamrachelbrooks and join us inside Create Your Own Story on Substack for deeper personal essays, honest conversations, and the stories behind the work. Listen, subscribe, and share this episode with the woman who may be questioning herself because her past has convinced her she can’t trust who she is becoming. Scripture referenced: Proverbs 3:5–6

What My Impatience Was Actually Trying to Tell Me

What happens when you lose your patience, regret the way you responded, and immediately make yourself the entire problem? It’s easy to replay the worst few seconds, criticize yourself, apologize, and decide you simply need to do better next time without ever asking what had been building long before the words came out. In this episode of The Confident Woman Podcast, Rachel opens an honest conversation about what frustration can reveal when you’ve become the capable, dependable woman everyone expects to handle it. She explores the difference between taking responsibility for your response and turning against yourself, especially when your time, energy, attention, and emotional capacity have been treated as though they’re always available. This isn’t about excusing the reaction or blaming everyone around you. It’s about being willing to look at the whole picture so you can understand what got you there, what you haven’t communicated, and whether the role you’ve been playing still fits the woman you’re becoming. This conversation will help you see: Why one response doesn’t erase the growth God has already done in you How being capable can slowly become an expectation that you’ll always be available What happens when people mistake your presence for access to your time and energy Why resentment often builds when you say yes before checking whether you actually have the capacity or desire How fear of disappointing people can keep you repeating patterns that are wearing you down Why being needed isn’t always the same as being valued What your body may be telling you before you’ve admitted that something isn’t working How becoming more patient may also require becoming more honest Taking responsibility for how you responded doesn’t mean you have to ignore what the response may be revealing. You can care about someone else’s needs, own your part, and still recognize when clearer communication, stronger boundaries, or a different way of handling something is necessary. Ready to Go Deeper? The Becoming Identity Planner & Journal gives you space to step back and look honestly at what’s happening across your responsibilities, relationships, body, joy, worth, boundaries, and decisions. This isn’t about adding more tasks to an already overloaded life. It’s about seeing the patterns beneath the pressure, understanding what your reactions may be connected to, and deciding what the woman you’re becoming needs to do differently, one honest page and one real decision at a time. Begin with The Becoming Identity Planner & Journal Connect with Rachel Brooks: Follow Rachel on Instagram: @iamrachelbrooks Join the weekly written conversation inside Create Your Own Story Explore Rachel’s books, programs, and resources at iamrachelbrooks.com Listen, subscribe, and share this episode with the woman who may be blaming herself for the reaction without understanding what’s been building underneath it. Scripture referenced: James 1:19

The World Will Keep Selling You Yourself

What do you reach for when you do not know what to do? When life feels uncertain, something is no longer working, and you cannot see what comes next, it is natural to start searching for an answer. A plan. A process. A person who has already crossed the bridge and can hand you the exact map she followed. But what happens when someone else’s blueprint was never created for you? In this episode of The Confident Woman, Rachel Brooks opens an honest conversation about the ways uncertainty can make us vulnerable to outside promises, world-created identities, and systems that appear to offer certainty. She shares the shadow side of always being the woman who makes things happen, why self-reliance can look like confidence and responsibility, and what begins to happen when we trust someone else’s strategy more than our own discernment and God’s direction. Because when the process does not work, we rarely question the process first. We question ourselves. This conversation explores: Why uncertainty sends us searching for external answers The shadow side of being an active doer and “making things happen” How the backwards do, have, be script keeps women performing The difference between receiving support and surrendering your discernment Why tools, plans, and strategies can help us but cannot become our source How following the wrong blueprint slowly erodes identity, confidence, and self-trust What it means to return to who you are and whose you are The world will continue packaging a more polished, productive, successful, and acceptable version of you and telling you that she is waiting on the other side of one more thing. But God is not asking you to purchase another identity. He is calling you back into relationship with Him so you can become more of who He already created you to be. Ready to Go Deeper? Becoming The Confident Woman is a private eight-week audio journey with a companion workbook created to help you examine the identities, beliefs, expectations, and patterns that have been directing your life. This is not another blueprint asking you to perform a different version of yourself. It is a guided space to get quiet, tell yourself the truth, reconnect with who you are and whose you are, and begin making your next decisions from identity rather than pressure. Begin Becoming The Confident Woman Continue the Conversation: Follow Rachel at @iamrachelbrooks and join Create Your Own Story on Substack for deeper personal essays, honest conversations, and the stories behind the work. Listen, subscribe, and share this episode with the woman who may be questioning herself because someone else’s blueprint did not fit her life. Scripture referenced: Matthew 14:22–33 and Philippians 4:13

What Part of Yourself Are You Trying to Get Back To?

What if the version of yourself you keep trying to get back to is the same version that no longer belongs in the life God is leading you into? In this week’s solo episode of The Confident Woman Podcast, Rachel Brooks explores the identity crisis that can happen when you are no longer fully who you were, but you do not completely recognize who you are becoming yet. This conversation invites you to look honestly at what you are trying to reclaim. Some parts of you may be rooted in faith, freedom, creativity, joy, and truth. Other parts may have been built through fear, pressure, control, survival, and the need to prove that you could handle everything. Becoming does not require you to reject your entire past. It asks you to discern what God may be restoring and transforming within. What You’ll Hear Why the familiar version of yourself can feel safer than the woman you are becoming How fear can disguise itself as responsibility, consistency, loyalty, or discipline Why becoming requires honesty before it gives you clarity How external blueprints and quick fixes can pull you away from who God created you to be The difference between reclaiming a true part of yourself and resurrecting a pattern that already exhausted you Why an identity that helped you survive one season may not be able to lead you into the next How to stop asking what the old version of you would do and begin listening to what the woman you are becoming needs Why becoming can begin with one honest decision instead of a complete plan for your future Scripture for the Soul “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal.” — Philippians 3:13–14 Paul’s words are permission to keep moving forward without continuing to obey identities, patterns, and expectations you have already outgrown. Key Quotes “The past can begin to look like safety and security, but it is not your present.” “You do not have to know exactly who you are becoming before releasing who you are no longer willing to be.” “Not every version of yourself is meant to come with you.” “What part of myself is God bringing back to life, and what part of me has already completed its purpose?” Your Next Step The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal helps you name the season you are actually in, recognize what you are still carrying, and explore where God may be calling you across your identity, faith, calling, work, body, relationships, joy, and money. Start with The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal Still unsure where you are in your becoming journey? Start with the free Becoming Quiz Connect with Rachel Brooks Website: iamrachelbrooks.com Podcast: iamrachelbrooks.com/podcast Instagram: instagram.com/iamrachelbrooks Newsletter: iamrachelbrooks.com/subscribe Substack: iamrachelbrooks.com/substack

When Becoming Feels Like Falling Apart

What do you do when you are no longer who you were, but you are not fully living as who you are becoming yet? In this week's solo episode of The Confident Woman Podcast, Rachel Brooks explores the uncomfortable in-between of becoming—the waiting, the growing pains, and the seasons that feel more like falling apart than moving forward. So often we ask God to remove the hard season, fix the problem, or show us the way out, but what if He is doing something even deeper? What if, instead of removing the struggle, He is increasing your capacity to carry what comes next? What if the transformation you've been praying for is already happening, even if you cannot see it yet? This conversation is an invitation to slow down, stop measuring your progress by how quickly your circumstances change, and begin recognizing the quieter work God may be doing within you. What You'll Hear Why becoming often feels like falling apart while it's happening Why we ask God to remove hard seasons instead of increasing our capacity to endure them How patience may be growing within you before your circumstances ever change Why transformation is often impossible to recognize from the inside The difference between relying on your own strength and relying on Christ Why the discomfort you're feeling may not mean you're off track Scripture for the Soul "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." — Philippians 4:13 Paul wasn't talking about achieving more, but bout remaining faithful whether life felt abundant or painfully difficult. The strength he describes isn't self-reliance. It's Christ sustaining us when our own strength has reached its limit. "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible." — Matthew 19:26 Some seasons remind us that we were never meant to carry the weight of transformation alone. Human effort eventually reaches its limit. God's presence never does. Key Quotes "Most of us keep asking God to get us out of the hard season without asking Him to increase our capacity to live through it." "The in-between is not wasted time. It's where the becoming actually happens." "Sometimes the greatest transformation isn't that our circumstances change. It's that we begin responding to them differently." Your Next Step Becoming The Confident Woman is an eight-week private audio journey with a companion workbook created to help you rebuild your confidence, identity, and faith from the inside out, so you can stop returning to the same patterns every time life feels uncertain. Learn more Still trying to understand where you are in your becoming journey? Start with the free Becoming Quiz Connect with Rachel Brooks: Website: https://iamrachelbrooks.com Podcast: https://iamrachelbrooks.com/podcast Instagram: https://instagram.com/iamrachelbrooks Newsletter: https://iamrachelbrooks.com/subscribe

How to Know When God Is Asking You to Let Go

What if the thing you’ve been holding onto isn't proof that you’re being responsible, but the very thing God is asking you to release? In this solo episode of The Confident Woman Podcast, Rachel Brooks shares the honest story behind the question that would not leave her alone: what is this costing me? After surviving one of the hardest seasons of her life, Rachel found herself looking at the weight she had been carrying, the pressure she kept trying to hold together, and the moment she realized God may have been loosening her grip before something was removed from her hands. This conversation isn't about walking away because something feels hard. It's about the deeper identity work of knowing when something was yours for a season, but somewhere along the way, you started confusing the assignment with alignment, and your peace, clarity, and sense of self began paying the price. Something can help you survive a season and still not be yours to keep carrying. And when God ends the assignment, you do not have to make it mean something about your worth. What You’ll Hear: How to ask, “What is this costing me?” when you’ve been afraid to let go Why something can serve a purpose and still not be where you are meant to stay The difference between abandoning responsibility and recognizing when an assignment is complete How proving, performing, carrying, producing, and fixing can make an ending feel like a verdict Why relief can sometimes tell you what your mind is still trying to argue with When the role changes, the assignment ends, and the thing you were holding onto no longer holds you Scripture for the Soul: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” — Proverbs 3:5 “We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps.” — Proverbs 16:9 Key Quotes: “What is this costing me?” “We can keep showing up, keep carrying the weight, and keep making ourselves fit into places and roles and seasons that technically work, but don’t fully fit anymore.” “Sometimes the thing that’s costing you peace is also giving you something you think you need.” “Something can serve a purpose and still be over and done.” “When you’ve spent so much of your life proving your worth through what you can do, what you can carry, what you can handle, what you can produce, what you can fix, an ending doesn’t always feel like an ending. It feels like a final verdict.” Your Next Step: If you are in that in-between place where something is ending, shifting, or no longer fits, start here: Take the Becoming Quiz If you're ready to reclaim your power and stop performing for your worth, start with The Becoming… Identity Planner & Journal Connect with Rachel Brooks: Website: iamrachelbrooks.com Instagram: instagram.com/iamrachelbrooks LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/iamrachelbrooks Podcast: iamrachelbrooks.com/podcast Subscribe: iamrachelbrooks.com/subscribe

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