Five-a-side

Five-a-side

by Five-aside
Season 3
Bafana Battered, Poch Under Pressure & Korea’s K-Pop Kick-Off
The World Cup is finally underway and the Five Aside crew are here to break down all the opening-day drama. AK and Inii react to an underwhelming opening ceremony, South Africa’s nightmare start against Mexico, South Korea’s impressive display against Czechia, and a chaotic Canada vs Bosnia clash. Plus, they preview USA vs Paraguay and debate whether Mauricio Pochettino’s Americans can finally live up to the hype. Banter, bold predictions, and plenty of football chaos as the tournament gets rolling. Timestamps 00:00 – Intro & World Cup excitement 00:43 – Opening ceremony reactions: did Mexico underdeliver? 01:56 – World Cup theme songs: Waka Waka vs the rest 03:08 – Mexico 2-0 South Africa review 04:00 – Why South Africa struggled so badly 06:52 – Mexico’s chances in the tournament 09:38 – Can South Africa recover from the opening defeat? 14:04 – South Korea vs Czechia review 16:36 – Lee Kang-in and South Korea’s midfield dominance 18:20 – Czechia’s strengths and set-piece threat 20:02 – Why Czechia may struggle to progress 23:13 – Canada vs Bosnia review 24:58 – Canada’s lack of quality despite the result 27:45 – Canada’s group-stage outlook 29:18 – USA vs Paraguay preview 30:18 – Can Pochettino deliver for the USA? 32:20 – Expectations for America’s “golden generation” 34:41 – Match predictions: USA vs Paraguay 35:54 – Looking ahead to Brazil vs Morocco 36:14 – Outro
World Cup is here, Atlanta’s Not Ready, Ronaldo’s Not Done, and Nigeria’s Not There
The Five A Side Podcast is BACK — and we're coming in hot with the World Cup already underway right here in Atlanta 🔥 We reunite the full crew — Dalu, AK, Temi, Haruna, and special guest Tobi — to break down everything World Cup 2026. From the vibe (or lack of it) in Atlanta, to who's actually winning this thing, to the African teams we're riding with all tournament long. We get into France's squad depth, Spain's scary balance, Portugal's Ronaldo problem, and why England under Tuchel might actually be different this time. Plus — Nigeria didn't make it. We had to talk about it. Then things get real when we debate the Thomas Partey handshake situation, the Somali referee denied a US visa, and what it means to host a World Cup in this political climate. Oh, and we close it out with the most memorable World Cup moments of all time — '82 Brazil, '06 Zidane vs Brazil, Uruguay vs Ghana 2010 — the nostalgia hit DIFFERENT. ⚽ Topics Covered: World Cup vibe in Atlanta — is the city ready? Full tournament predictions: France, Spain, Brazil, Argentina Portugal's midfield depth vs the Ronaldo problem African teams built for the heat — Morocco, Senegal, Côte d'Ivoire England squad selection debate: Palmer, Maguire, Bellingham, Henderson Group of Death breakdown MVP predictions for the tournament Thomas Partey controversy Most memorable World Cup moments ever 🎙️ Subscribe, like, and share with your people. Five Aside will be at the games in Atlanta all tournament — stay locked in. #WorldCup2026 #FiveAsidePodcast #Atlanta #WorldCup #Football #Soccer #PremierLeague #Nigeria #Arsenal #France #Spain #Portugal #England #africanfootball Timestamps 0:00 – Intro / Banter & Setup 1:45 – Welcome Back / Temi Returns to the Pod 3:00 – World Cup in Atlanta: Vibe Check & Is the City Ready? 7:00 – Atlanta World Cup Energy vs. European Host Cities 8:45 – Who's Winning the World Cup? Predictions Begin 9:00 – AK's Pick: France — Why They're the Most Balanced Squad 14:00 – Dalu's Pick: Spain — The Most Complete Team 17:30 – Haruna's Heart: Portugal & Bruno Fernandes Hype 20:30 – Portugal's Midfield Debate: Are They Actually the Best? 22:00 – Ronaldo Problem: Does He Hurt Portugal? 24:00 – Tobi Joins the Pod / His Pick: Spain, Dark Horse: Netherlands 26:00 – 48 Teams, 12 Groups — Nigeria Didn't Make It. How We Feeling? 28:30 – What Does Expanding to 48 Teams Mean for Quality? 29:30 – Will the Heat Be a Factor? African Teams Built Different 31:30 – African Teams to Watch: Morocco, Senegal, Côte d'Ivoire, Congo 33:30 – Japan as a Dark Horse? France Won't Make the Semis? 37:00 – Norway & Ødegaard: Underrated Group Stage Threat 38:30 – Group of Death: France, Norway, Senegal, Iraq 40:30 – England Under Tuchel: How Far Can They Go? 45:00 – MVP Predictions: Bruno / Yamal / Olise / Messi / Ødegaard 49:00 – Top Contenders Breakdown: Can Anyone Upset France, Spain, Brazil, Argentina? 51:00 – England Squad Selection Debate: Palmer, Maguire, Bellingham, Henderson 58:00 – Favorite World Cup Songs (Wavy Flag, Waka Waka) 1:08:00 – Most Memorable World Cup Games (2002, 2006, 2010, 2014) 1:15:00 – Brazil '82: The Best Team to Never Win 1:20:00 – Nigeria's Missed Opportunity: What It Means for the Golden Generation 1:25:00 – African Teams: South Africa, Cape Verde, Egypt, Congo Deep Dive 1:31:00 – Somali Referee Denied Visa / FIFA & Immigration at the World Cup 1:32:00 – Thomas Partey Handshake Controversy: Debate Gets Heated 1:44:00 – Outro / Five Aside in Atlanta for the World Cup
An Arsenal Fan's Mum Tells Her Side of the Story
What happens when a Nigerian mum discovers her son has two dangerous obsessions: animals and football? In this hilarious and heartwarming episode, Dalu sits down with his mum to unpack the origin story of his football addiction. From kissing cats and sleeping in dog houses to singing Okocha's name at sunset, the conversation takes a nostalgic turn through Nigerian football culture, Rangers vs Iwuanyanwu chaos, World Cup memories, Arsenal heartbreak, and the moment Neymar won Mum's heart forever. A funny family conversation packed with football banter, childhood stories, and unexpected Neymar fandom. Timestamps 00:00 – Introducing Mum's first Five Aside appearance 00:45 – The childhood animal obsession that worried Mum 02:00 – The infamous cat-kissing incident 03:00 – Discovering football through Jay-Jay Okocha 05:00 – Why Mum thought football passion was dangerous 05:40 – Rangers vs Iwuanyanwu: the referee-slapping story 07:40 – Football becomes the "lesser evil" 08:20 – Growing up with football injuries and football conversations 09:15 – Mum learns football through Messi, Brazil and international stars 10:00 – The Brazil match that made Mum fall in love with Neymar 11:30 – Neymar mania: skill, dribbles and surviving tackles 12:40 – Praying for Neymar after his injuries 13:20 – Is anyone else in the family this football-obsessed? 14:20 – How Kanu, Arsenal and neighbours shaped Dalu's fandom 15:20 – Supporting Arsenal and 20+ years of suffering 16:00 – Mum's plea for Arsenal to stop ruining household happiness 16:25 – Future appearances and signing off
PSG’d Off! Arsenal Fall on Pens, Fans Lose Their Heads & Dembele Enters Legend Status
Arsenal’s Champions League dream ends in the cruelest way possible: penalties. In this special Five Aside fan reaction episode, emotions are running wild as Gunners and PSG supporters debate controversial penalty decisions, Dembele vs Mbappé legacy talk, Arteta’s tactics, transfer targets, and whether Arsenal are one step away from becoming Europe’s next powerhouse. Raw, passionate, and completely unfiltered fan reactions straight from the final. Timestamps 00:00 – PSG fans celebrate European glory 01:00 – Is this PSG team the start of a dynasty? 02:00 – Ligue 1 advantage debate & Dembele's performance 03:00 – Dembele vs Mbappé: Who is the bigger PSG legend? 04:00 – Arsenal fans react to the heartbreak 04:45 – Did PSG deserve the win? Tactical breakdown 06:00 – The penalty controversy explodes 07:00 – Arsenal’s squad, transfers & Premier League success 08:00 – Chelsea fans join the banter 08:45 – Were Arsenal actually the better team? 09:30 – Arsenal supporters process the defeat 10:30 – Reasons for optimism: Arsenal’s future in Europe 11:15 – Summer transfer targets discussed 12:00 – Kvaratskhelia to Arsenal? Fan recruitment pitch 12:45 – Eze debate: Hero or culprit? 14:00 – Arteta criticism and Gabriel’s penalty miss 15:00 – Should Gabriel have been taking penalties? 16:00 – Rival fans give Arsenal credit despite defeat 17:00 – VAR inconsistency and major refereeing decisions 18:00 – Deflated Arsenal fans look ahead to next season 19:00 – Full match breakdown and tactical reflections 20:00 – Kvaratskhelia penalty incident revisited 21:00 – Madueke penalty controversy debate 22:00 – Neutral perspective on the refereeing decisions 23:00 – Did the better team win? Final verdicts 24:00 – Why Arsenal fans should still believe
Fly Emirates vs Emirates Fly Better 😭✈️ Arsenal vs PSG Gets Toxic
The Five Aside crew goes ALL IN on the UCL Final debate as Arsenal fans, PSG supporters, and certified football terrorists clash over tactics, “world-class” players, underdog narratives, and whether Declan Rice can survive PSG’s midfield chaos. From Saka debates to Arteta tactics, Hakimi injury concerns, Enrique’s revenge arc, and Arsenal fans claiming “the pressure is off” — this one gets HEATED. Plus: the funniest joke of the episode — “Fly Emirates vs Emirates Fly Better” — might genuinely decide the final. 😭 Will PSG’s attack overpower Arsenal’s defense? Or are the Gunners finally ready to complete the dream? Chaos, banter, and football Twitter-level headloss throughout. Timestamp 0:00 Intro & panel predictions 3:00 Arsenal defence vs PSG attack debate 7:00 PSG's system — how they attack 8:00 Flanks vs midfield — Bayern comparison 10:00 Route to the final 11:00 Underdog debate 13:00 Arsenal fan culture & social media 16:00 World-class players in Arsenal's squad? 17:00 Weak Premier League season debate 22:00 Arsenal going in with no pressure 24:00 PSG overconfidence — Club World Cup story 26:00 Luis Enrique respects Arteta 28:00 How will Arteta set up? 31:00 Timber vs Mosquera at right back 34:00 Martinelli vs Zubimendi 36:00 PSG midfield — just let them have it? 37:00 Joint combined XI begins 43:00 Midfield trio — Rice, Vitinha, Neves 47:00 Right wing — Saka vs Doué 51:00 Left wing — Dembélé as player of the tournament 54:00 Luis Enrique's team-first culture 57:00 Match predictions 1:01:00 Dembélé vs Mbappé — bigger PSG legend? 1:03:00 Rice vs Fabregas — bigger Arsenal legend? 1:08:00 Daniel defends Fabregas 1:11:00 How we became fans — origin stories 1:16:00 Final words & outro
North London’s Red Wedding: Arsenal Fans Finally Lose Their Heads
Arsenal fans in Atlanta absolutely lose the plot after finally ending the drought — and the scenes are pure chaos. From emotional lifelong supporters and rival fan banter to Bruno Fernandes debates, Tottenham survival stress, Klopp nostalgia, and Arteta praise, this one has everything football culture is about. There’s singing. There’s screaming. There’s tears. There’s cooked takes. And somehow Spurs fans still caught strays. Football heritage was alive and well tonight. Timestamps 00:00 – Arsenal fans flood the celebrations 00:45 – Father & son Arsenal story goes emotional 01:45 – “I don’t know what to feel” after winning the league 02:40 – Arsenal fan club president speaks on the journey 04:10 – “We suffered for this” – emotional Arsenal speech 05:20 – Predictions for next season & Champions League hopes 06:00 – Reliving Arsenal heartbreak over the years 07:10 – Rival fans react to Arsenal’s title win 08:15 – Bruno Fernandes vs Declan Rice debate erupts 10:00 – Set-piece assists argument gets heated 11:20 – United fans back themselves for next season 12:00 – Crowd chaos & trophy celebrations continue 13:10 – Harry Kane banter and trophy jokes 14:00 – Arsenal fans already predicting next season 15:00 – “We want our trophy!” crowd takeover 16:10 – Years of banter finally paid back 17:00 – “God did” – Arsenal fans celebrate the payoff 18:00 – Chelsea fan reacts to Arsenal lifting the title 19:00 – Pep Guardiola, Man City & next season discussion 21:00 – Liverpool fans debate Arne Slot & Klopp legacy 23:00 – Klopp vs Pep tactical legacy discussion 25:00 – Nigerian football shoutouts & fan culture 26:00 – Lifelong Arsenal fan reflects on the pain years 27:00 – Champions League optimism goes through the roof 29:00 – Spurs fan enters the chaos 30:00 – Relegation survival stress explained 31:00 – “Slot Out” chants begin 33:00 – Tottenham ownership frustrations aired out 34:00 – Chelsea ownership & oil money banter 35:00 – More title celebration madness 36:00 – Arsenal’s defense praised as Europe’s best 37:00 – Final trophy scenes & crowd erupts
Who Knows Ball: Assist me if you can!
Manchester United finally got their hands on a trophy this season… unfortunately it’s the all-time assist leaders list. 😭 Who really knows ball better? Temi puts Chidalu and Ak through a brutal Premier League assists challenge — naming players from the ALL-TIME EPL assist leaders list until somebody folds. From safe picks like Giggs and KDB to outrageous misses, panic answers, and the shocking Özil debate, this one gets heated FAST. Plus, someone’s walking away with free Chick-fil-A… and someone’s walking away ashamed. 😂 Did they cook or embarrass themselves? Watch till the end and play along in the comments. Timestamps 0:00 – Intro & rules explained 0:42 – The EPL assists challenge begins 1:15 – Giggs, Fabregas & Henry start strong 2:00 – Jesus FAILS immediately 😭 2:35 – Van Persie miss shocks everyone 2:55 – The Mesut Özil controversy 3:30 – Gareth Barry sneaks onto the list 4:00 – Drogba & Gerrard enter the chat 4:45 – James Milner top 10 revelation 5:10 – Dennis Bergkamp saves Arsenal fans 5:45 – Ashley Cole confusion causes chaos 6:25 – Roy Keane disasterclass 6:55 – David Silva & Scholes restore order 7:35 – Raheem Sterling surprise appearance 8:10 – Pressure starts hitting HARD 9:00 – Mo Salah almost forgotten 😭 9:45 – Bruno Fernandes sneaks into top 20 10:20 – Winner crowned + Chick-fil-A trophy 10:50 – Outro, donations & absolute nonsense
Light It Up! Arsenal Finally Beat the "Next Season FC" Allegations 🔥🏆
Arsenal are Premier League champions — and the Five Aside boys are losing their minds. From emotional fan confessions to Declan Rice propaganda, Arteta debates, Pep Guardiola legacy talk, and Xabi Alonso confirmed at Chelsea, this episode is pure football chaos. We also get into João Pedro's Brazil snub, Salah's Liverpool legacy, Mourinho to Real Madrid, and whether Arsenal are about to build a dynasty… or if this is just a one-hit wonder. Banter levels? Through the roof. Timestamps 00:00 - Haircut bets, forgiveness & Arsenal finally deliver 02:15 - Arsenal crowned Premier League champions 05:00 - "Netflix FC" no more: emotional Arsenal reactions 06:50 - The moment Arsenal fans knew the title was real 10:25 - Biggest games of Arsenal's season 14:00 - Arteta debate: genius coach or attacking fraud? 16:20 - The Aston Villa & Man City performances that changed everything 20:00 - Arsenal's spine: Rice, Gabriel, Saliba & Saka 23:30 - Odegaard captaincy arguments get HEATED 30:00 - Declan Rice appreciation session 32:50 - Pep Guardiola potentially leaving Man City 34:10 - Is Arteta the new sheriff in town? 35:15 - Arsenal transfer needs for a title dynasty 38:50 - João Pedro left out of Brazil squad discussion 44:40 - Xabi Alonso confirmed as Chelsea manager reaction 48:30 - Can Chelsea finally trust a manager long-term? 55:00 - Salah, Griezmann & Lewandowski legacy debate 58:40 - Liverpool fans, Trent drama & football loyalty talk 01:00:30 - Who is Liverpool's next legend after Salah? 01:06:50 - Mourinho to Real Madrid — good idea or disaster? 01:13:00 - Will Arsenal defend the title? Final takes
Straight Outta the Pub: Reece PTO James & the FA Cup Funeral 🍺🏆
The FA Cup watch party descended into absolute chaos as City fans celebrated another trophy and Chelsea fans held a full-on therapy session. From “Reece PTO James” jokes to Petr Čech cosplay slander, this episode has everything: brutal banter, player-of-the-season debates, treble talk, and one very emotional Chelsea fan trying to survive another disappointing final. Plus: City fans arguing Bernardo vs Cherki, Arsenal catching random strays, and pub chants that definitely shouldn’t be sung around children. Pure football pub culture. Timestamps 00:00 – “Reece PTO James” enters the chat 01:00 – City fans celebrate FA Cup glory 02:05 – “That match was a snoozefest” 02:45 – Semenyo praise & Doku debates 03:20 – Bernardo Silva Player of the Season shouts 04:00 – “When did you become a City fan?” interrogation 05:45 – Chelsea fan therapy session begins 06:30 – Joao Pedro, Delap & Reece James frustrations 07:50 – Chelsea’s season officially cooked 08:10 – Reece James & Enzo Fernandez analysis 09:15 – Javi Alonso to Chelsea rumors 10:05 – Chelsea transfer clearout wishlist 11:05 – Declan Rice league Player of the Season shout 12:00 – Why Enzo still has Chelsea DNA 13:00 – “Most finals are just boring” 14:00 – Chelsea board gets blamed for everything 15:00 – “This loss is on the board, not the fans” 16:00 – Petr Čech gimmick keeper slander 17:00 – Can City still win the league? 18:00 – Cherki hype reaches dangerous levels 19:10 – Proper pub chants & football culture 20:00 – Longtime City fan shares his origin story 21:00 – The season turnaround after Christmas 22:00 – Bernardo Silva Arsenal-hater appreciation 23:00 – Bruno Fernandes Player of the Season debate 24:00 – Comparing this City team to the treble winners 25:00 – Women’s Super League talk & Leicester catching strays
Barcelona Won La Liga… Madrid Chose Violence 😭
The lads are BACK and absolutely flying. We break down Chelsea’s FA Cup hopes vs Pep’s machine, Barcelona clinching La Liga while Madrid descend into pure chaos, and the growing Rashford-to-Barca agenda. Plus: Mourinho to Madrid rumors, Arsenal UCL dreams, Spurs & West Ham in a relegation scrap nobody expected, and why Barça might still not be ready for Europe. Pure football banter from start to finish. Timestamps 00:00 – Intro & today’s football chaos 01:20 – Chelsea vs Man City FA Cup final preview 05:20 – Pep overthinking & Chelsea’s chances 09:00 – Arsenal UCL hopes vs PSG debate 16:40 – Barcelona crowned La Liga champions 18:50 – Has Hansi Flick overachieved with this Barça squad? 22:00 – Is La Liga weak or are Barcelona elite? 29:20 – Rashford to Barcelona talks heat up 31:20 – Could Rashford end up at Arsenal? 35:00 – Arsenal title race & Champions League pressure 41:00 – VAR, grappling & set-piece controversies 43:50 – Arsenal injuries & Kvaratskhelia fears 46:10 – Arsenal vs PSG final confidence levels 46:50 – Crystal Palace vs Man City reactions 48:00 – Savinho, Grealish & City squad depth 56:50 – Florentino Perez press conference madness 01:00:00 – Mourinho to Madrid rumors discussed 01:07:00 – Why Mourinho could actually work at Madrid 01:13:30 – Spurs vs West Ham relegation embarrassment 01:18:30 – Future of Barça vs Mourinho’s Madrid in 3 years 01:24:00 – Why Barcelona still might struggle in Europe 01:26:00 – Mourinho’s legacy & Manchester United debate 01:30:30 – Outro
1 of 12