Episode 4: The Incompetent Suitor

The incompetent suitor is a type of stalker whose behavior is often minimized as awkwardness, misunderstanding, or “not knowing better.” In this episode, we explore stalking driven by loneliness or desire, where the goal is access not connection.

We discuss why repeated advances after rejection are harmful, how distress is often ignored or dismissed, and how social pressure frequently shifts responsibility onto the victim. The episode also addresses disability and neurodiversity with care making clear that understanding context never excuses harm.

This conversation reinforces that discomfort is a valid boundary and that survivors are not responsible for educating others at the expense of their safety.

Understanding this pattern helps survivors trust their instincts ...