Forge the Man
Season 1
by Fairest Love Family Project
Most Catholic men have heard of two vocations: marriage or the priesthood. In this episode of Forge The Man, Paul talks with James Herrick — a civil engineer, poet, and mentor living in the Bay Area — about a third path many have never considered: the celibate vocation of a numerary in Opus Dei. James walks through his own discernment story from third grade all the way through his decisive commitment in 2010, including the mentors, retreats, and quiet nudges that shaped his path. The conversation moves into the practical side of discernment — building a real prayer life, finding a spiritual director, and learning to hear God's voice in the ordinary noise of daily life — and closes with a moving tribute to two close friends, both numeraries, who died saving a third man from drowning. It's a conversation about vocation, mentorship, legacy, and what it really means to give your life away. James Herrick grew up in Colorado, New Jersey, and Virginia, and attended the University of Notre Dame, graduating in 2016. He has worked as a civil engineer in New York, Los Angeles, and now the Bay Area, and is preparing to begin a master's program at Pepperdine University. James comes from a family with a long military and pilgrim history. Since high school, he's written poetry, deepened his prayer life, and mentored young men through Opus Dei programs and service trips around the world. Subscribe to Forge The Man for more real conversations on vocation, discernment, and what it looks like for Catholic men to give their lives away — whether married, single, or still figuring it out. Share this episode with a friend who's in the thick of discernment right now.
What if most of what you want — the job, the truck, the girl, the tattoo — isn't really yours? In this episode of Forge The Man, Paul sits down with Trevor Merrill, scholar, novelist, and director of Imitatio, to unpack the work of French thinker René Girard — the man Peter Thiel has credited with shaping his approach to leadership. Trevor breaks down two of Girard's biggest ideas: mimetic desire (we imitate the desires of others more than we realize) and scapegoating (how groups — from ancient tribes to Twitter mobs — offload tension onto a single target). Along the way, Paul and Trevor get practical: how to avoid office politics, how to choose good models instead of flashy ones, why freshman year roommates become rivals, and how young men can build a life around something deeper than comparative advantage. It's a conversation for any man trying to figure out what he actually wants — and who he should be listening to. Trevor Merrill manages Imitatio, a program devoted to advancing René Girard's mimetic theory, and has translated and edited several of Girard's books. He's a novelist (Minor Indignities, 2020; The Comforts of Exile, forthcoming September 2026), a co-producer of the documentary Things Hidden: The Life and Legacy of René Girard, and has taught French language and literature at Caltech for over a decade. He is currently translating a forthcoming biography of Girard for Stanford University Press. Trevor and his wife Carolyn converted to Catholicism (2015 and 2017, respectively) and have four children. Resources & Books Mentioned Deceit, Desire, and the Novel — René Girard Violence and the Sacred — René Girard Things Hidden Since the Foundation of the World — René Girard Wanting — Luke Burgess Clever as Serpents — (mimetic theory applied to management/office politics) Finding True Happiness — Fr. Robert Spitzer Aristotle's Way — Edith Hall Documentary: Things Hidden: The Life and Legacy of René Girard Trevor Merrill's novels: Minor Indignities (2020), The Comforts of Exile (forthcoming Sept. 2026)
What does over 40 years in law enforcement teach a man about leadership, faith, marriage, and vocation? Former LAPD Commander Ignacio Verduzco shares lessons from over four decades of service as a Marine, police officer, and leader. to discuss serving as a Marine, leading police officers through some of Los Angeles' most difficult decades, and why integrity, patience, and mentorship matter more than ever. From growing up in Los Angeles after immigrating from Mexico to serving 37 years with the LAPD (and continuing in the Honor Guard), Ignacio reflects on what young Catholic men need most today: integrity, patience, courage, mentorship, and a vocation of service. This conversation isn't just for aspiring police officers—it's for every Catholic man seeking excellence in his work, family, and spiritual life. Whether you're considering law enforcement or simply striving to become a better husband, father, leader, or professional, this conversation offers timeless wisdom forged through decades of difficult decisions.
What does it take to build a life of purpose? In this episode of Forge The Man, Paul Ybarra talks with Ray Tittmann about his path to becoming a lawyer, the transformative power of a liberal arts education, and why faith, mentorship, and great books remain essential for personal and professional growth. Ray shares why mentorship is essential for both personal and professional growth and explains how spending time with the world's greatest thinkers helps sharpen critical thinking, and how cultivating critical thinking through timeless wisdom can help you make better decisions, pursue meaningful success, and ultimately live a more fulfilled life. 00:00 Introduction to Ray and His Journey 02:16 Educational Background and Its Impact on Law 03:54 The Home Depot Case and Law 360 MVP Award 05:19 The Importance of Reading and Critical Thinking 08:18 Choosing the Right College and Education Philosophy 10:12 The Value of Mentorship 12:48 Approaching Mentors and Building Relationships 15:45 Following Opportunities Over Passions 20:18 The Role of Great Thinkers in Personal Development 22:24 Engaging with Difficult Texts and Mental Exercise 25:01 The Importance of Work and Pursuing Excellence 26:58 Action Items for Professional Preparation
What makes a father's influence last for generations? In this episode, Will Boles shares how his father's example shaped his faith, family, and leadership. From prioritizing spiritual formation despite a demanding career to creating meaningful family traditions and modeling humility in marriage and parenting, Will unpacks the lessons that continue to guide his life today. Whether you're a father, husband, leader, or simply someone thinking about the legacy you want to leave, this conversation offers practical wisdom on sacrifice, presence, and the transformative power of self-giving love.
In this special episode, we remember the inspiring lives of Val Creus, Matthew Schoenecker, and Matthew Anthony, three numerary members of Opus Dei who tragically passed away on June 18th 2025 after attempting to save one another in the waters of Rattlesnake Falls. Listen as we explore their exemplified virtue, courage, dedication to their faith, and generosity for others. Through their lives, we learn how ordinary responsibilities can be transformed into acts of sanctity, service, and preparation for the heroic sacrifices God calls each of us to make. 00:00 Introduction to Forge the Man and Guest Introduction 02:06 The Lives and Vocation of Val Creus, Matt Anthony, and Matt Schoenecker 10:09 Annual Courses and Community Life in Opus Dei 10:41 The Tragic Accident at Rattlesnake Falls 19:01 Processing Grief and Finding Hope 24:38 Lessons from the Lives of Val Creus, Matt Anthony, and Matt Schoenecker 30:54 Advice for Young Men on Discerning Vocation 34:58 Closing Thoughts and Encouragement
In this insightful interview, Dominic Dizon shares his journey through medical school, the challenges faced, and the virtues essential for aspiring physicians. He emphasizes the importance of soft skills, faith, and purpose in a medical career, offering practical advice for those discerning their vocation. 00:00Introduction to the Forge and Guest Background 02:33Overcoming Personal Hurdles in Medical School 05:08The Importance of Mentorship in Medicine 07:54Essential Skills for Aspiring Physicians 11:02Navigating Residency and Financial Challenges 13:17Traits of Successful Medical Students 16:17A Day in the Life of a Physician 21:48Balancing Family Life and Professional Responsibilities 27:39The Purpose Behind Medical Work and Vocation 31:25Advice for Career Discernment
In this inspiring interview, Kirby Fike shares his journey of faith, family, and fatherhood, including how he supports a large family of 12 children while balancing career and faith. Discover practical insights on raising children, maintaining a strong marriage, and embracing a life of virtue and purpose. 00:00 Introduction and Guest Background 00:57 Meeting and Marrying His Wife 01:41 Deciding on a Large Family 02:50 Educational Background and Career Shift 04:29 Financial Support and Family Life in California 06:51 The Role of a Stay-at-Home Mom 08:35 Children’s Responsibilities and Family Leadership 10:00 The Joys of a Large Family 13:12 Overcoming Social Pressure and Cultural Views 16:20 Family Meals and Virtue Education 19:27 Conflict Resolution in a Large Household 21:34 Supporting His Children in Sports 26:50 Life with Young Children and Twins 29:53 Advice for Young Men Considering Marriage 34:36 Prayers and Spiritual Practices for Future Families 36:06 Closing Remarks and Inspiration Resources: Father the Family Protector by Jim Stenson
Dana Cruz, an attorney with extensive experience in government, policy, and military law, shares his inspiring journey from a working-class background to Harvard and his career in California's legal and legislative systems. He offers valuable insights on preparation, resilience, networking, and the virtues needed for success in law and public service. 00:00 Introduction to Dana Cruz and His Journey 02:51 From Aspirations to Reality: Dana's Career Path 05:51 Academic Preparation for Law School 09:03 The Importance of Discipline and Grit 12:03 The Role of Mentorship in Career Development 12:56 Embracing Failure as a Learning Opportunity 15:34 Advice on Seeking Excellence Over Glory 17:49 Networking Strategies for Aspiring Lawyers 20:30 A Day in the Life of a Policy Lawyer 22:22 Debunking Myths About Lawyers 25:17 Actionable Steps for Aspiring Lawyers 28:50 Closing Thoughts and Final Advice
In this introductory episode of the Forge the Man podcast, host Paul Ybarra, discusses the purpose and vision behind the podcast, which aims to mentor young men by sharing valuable life lessons and experiences from various role models. Paul shares his own background, the importance of mentorship, and the types of guests that will be featured in future episodes, emphasizing the need for positive male influences in today's society. This podcast is aimed at young men aged 21 to 36. There is a significant need for mentorship in today's culture. Paul's father played a crucial role in his upbringing. Mentorship can help young men avoid mistakes and build confidence. The podcast will feature stories from virtuous role models. Coaching and mentorship are essential for personal development. Paul emphasizes the importance of a good work ethic. The podcast aims to fill gaps in mentorship for young men. Listeners will gain hope and inspiration from the guests' stories. The podcast is part of a larger initiative to support family life.