Find the Joy
Season 1
by Courtney Vroman
Takeaways Changing direction does not mean you failed, and a dream can still be honored when you choose a different path. Our dreams can grow up with us and change shape as we change, and that is okay. The timing of your life may be working out better than you think, because you may need certain experiences before you can fully appreciate where you land. Some of life's greatest joys are ordinary ones, like showing up, figuring things out, and building something together. Summary of the Episode In this episode of Find the Joy, host Courtney Vroman shares one of the biggest plot twists of her life: discovering that she genuinely loves working with her husband every single day. She dedicates the episode to him, even though he may never listen to it. Courtney takes you back to high school, when nearly all of her plans for the future involved music. She grew up performing on the stage of her local opera house, and she was accepted into a music conservatory in Los Angeles. When she asked her boyfriend, now her husband, what he thought, he encouraged her to go for it. That support gave her the freedom to make the decision for herself. She chose a university closer to home, studied music, and graduated with a flexible degree. She was happy with that choice and never felt like she was settling. After five or so years of trying different jobs, she found herself working full-time on the family farm, and this is now her fourth harvest season. The real surprise was not the farm work itself. It was getting to work alongside her husband and enjoy it. Courtney then turns the conversation to you. She asks how often we overlook the goodness in unexpected chapters because we keep comparing them to the story we originally wrote. She closes with a question to carry with you: what is something about your life right now that would surprise your younger self? Listen to Find the Joy wherever you get your podcasts. https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways Most of us spend so much energy imagining how something could fail that we never picture what happens if it works. Flip the question from "What if I fail?" to "What if I don't?" The stories we tell ourselves ("I'm too old," "I'm too busy," "I'm not confident") are not facts. The biggest thing standing between you and the life you want is often the willingness to believe you are capable of more. You do not need the whole plan. Write down the thing you keep coming back to, decide on step one, and do it. Courage often shows up after you act, not before. Summary of the episode In the final episode of her fall series on becoming the person you want to be, Courtney asks one question: what if you actually did it? She invites listeners to imagine the other side of the thing they have been talking, praying, and journaling about, whether that is starting a business, finishing a project, getting healthier, going back to school, making more time for God, or finally taking the trip. Courtney points out that we easily picture the failure, the embarrassment, and the opinions of other people, and rarely stop to picture what happens if it all works out. She is clear that this is not about magical transformation or believing hard enough. Sometimes doors close, plans change, and God takes us somewhere unexpected. Courtney reminds listeners that the series was never about checking every goal off a list. It was about becoming a woman who is willing to try, willing to grow, and willing to start again. If you did not do everything you set out to do this fall, she wants you to know you did not fail. You started paying attention and asking better questions. Courtney closes with a practical challenge for the week ahead. Write down the thing that keeps coming back to your mind, then ask what the very first step is. Not the whole plan, just step one, and then do it. She shares that courage often comes because we act, and that the woman you want to become is not going to appear overnight. You build her, one decision, one promise, and one brave step at a time. The episode ends with an invitation to stop underestimating yourself, trust God with what you cannot control, and keep becoming more fully who you were created to be. https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways Gratitude and ambition are not opposites. You can love the life you have and still want more for it, and wanting more does not make you ungrateful or selfish. Your "more" may not be money, a bigger house, or a better job. It may be more confidence, creativity, courage, discipline, margin, adventure, or time with God. Wanting more only works if you are willing to do something different. If you want a different result, you have to be open to the process, the discomfort, and being a beginner. Summary of the episode In this fall series episode, Courtney tackles something a lot of women struggle to admit: you can want more for your life without being ungrateful for the life you already have. She names the belief that if we are grateful we should be content, and if we are content we should not want anything different. Courtney gives listeners permission to separate those two ideas and shows how contentment and ambition can sit at the same table. From there she gets practical about what "more" actually means. It might be a bigger dream, or it might simply be more confidence, more courage, more margin, or more time with God. Courtney explains that many of us are not afraid of wanting more, we are afraid of admitting what we want because of what people might think. She encourages listeners to get curious instead of shutting desires down, to pray about them, and to ask God what he wants them to do with what they have already been given, so that wanting more comes from stewardship and not dissatisfaction. Courtney also gets real about the part we tend to skip. We say we want more energy, time, or confidence, but we do not always want to change our habits, say no, or be uncomfortable. She reminds listeners that becoming your best self does not mean the current version of you is broken. It means you are growing. The episode ends with a simple challenge: finish the sentence "If I were completely honest, I would love more ___ in my life," ask why, and identify one small step toward it. https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways One bad day, one missed workout, or one skipped habit does not define who you are. The real problem shows up when a single setback becomes your reason to quit. Starting again is not starting over. Every time you fall off a goal you learn something about yourself, and that information is growth you get to carry into your next attempt. Success this season does not have to mean never falling off. It can mean getting better at coming back, which builds resilience, discipline, and self-trust. Summary of the episode In this fall series episode, Courtney speaks directly to the listener who started strong on her goals and then watched them slip. Whether it was a sick kid, a chaotic work week, or a late night that turned into a skipped morning routine, she names the moment so many of us hit when we decide we blew it. Courtney explains why falling off is inevitable when you are working on becoming your best self, and why the real danger is letting one bad choice turn into a permanent identity. She gets personal with the story she has told herself for years: that she is simply not a morning person. She shares how that label became a convenient way to avoid the early wake-ups her own goals required, and how a daily devotional called New Morning Mercies landed as a gentle reminder that this identity does not have to stick. From there, Courtney reframes the restart. Starting again means you are not starting from scratch, because you now know what worked, what did not, and what you might want to change, like moving your routine to the evening or finding an accountability partner. Courtney also gives practical permission to stop waiting. Skip the perfectly color-coded Monday plan and start on a Tuesday afternoon if that is when you realize you want to try again. She talks about grace and growth as two sides of the same coin, encouraging listeners to be kind to themselves without letting grace keep them stuck. The episode closes with a new definition of success and a simple challenge: think about what you have stopped doing because you believe you have already failed, and take the next small step back toward it. https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways The goal isn't perfection. It's proving to yourself, one small promise at a time, that you can count on you. Smaller, specific promises that actually get kept build more trust with yourself than big, vague ones that get broken. You don't need motivation to follow through. You need a decision, and that decision is available to you every single day. Summary of the episode Courtney checks in on the fall series challenge she's been building for the last few weeks, asking listeners what actually happened to the goals and future-self work they set out to do. She's honest about her own struggle here, sharing that she was voted "worst procrastinator" in her high school senior class and admitting how easily she let that label become an identity she leaned into instead of pushed against. The core idea of the episode is a reframe: becoming the person you want to be has less to do with big transformation and more to do with learning to keep the promises you make to yourself. Courtney walks through why this is so hard, we keep appointments, show up for work, and remember everyone else's needs, but when it comes to the things we promise ourselves, like walking more or starting a project, other things take precedence. Every broken promise makes it a little easier to stop believing yourself, and every kept one teaches you that you can be trusted. She offers a practical fix for anyone who has stalled out on their fall goals: make the promise smaller. Instead of "I'll work out every day," try "I'll walk for 20 minutes three times this week." Instead of "I'll read my Bible every morning for the rest of my life," try "tomorrow morning, ten minutes in God's Word." The episode closes with a direct challenge: name one promise you haven't been keeping, make it smaller and more specific, and keep it, not perfectly, just start. Key Topics Covered: Checking in on the fall series future-self challenge Why we keep promises to everyone except ourselves How a broken promise erodes self-trust, and a kept one builds it Courtney's own story with procrastination and letting a label become an identity Why smaller, specific promises are more powerful than big vague ones Choosing a decision over waiting for motivation This week's challenge: name one promise and keep it https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways Motivation is a feeling, and feelings are unreliable. Waiting to feel motivated before you act keeps most people stuck indefinitely. The real order of change isn't motivation, then action, then results. It's action, then momentum, then motivation. Confidence and discipline aren't prerequisites for starting. They're built by starting, one small, repeatable action at a time. Summary of the episode Courtney picks up where last week's episode left off, digging into why so many of us wait for the "right time," the right mood, or the right amount of confidence before we start working toward the future version of ourselves. She names the quiet trap in that thinking: saying "I'll start when I feel motivated" is often just a more comfortable way of saying "I'm afraid to start." The heart of the episode reframes the order most of us assume is true. We think motivation leads to action, which leads to results. Courtney argues it's usually the reverse: you take the action first, momentum builds, and motivation follows. She uses everyday examples, a ten-minute walk, washing one dish, cleaning a single drawer, to show how small, unmotivated first steps can turn into real progress. She connects this directly back to the three questions from last week's episode (who do you want to become, what does that version of you do differently, what's one thing you can do this week) and issues a challenge: pick one thing you've been putting off and take a single small step toward it this week, before you talk yourself out of it. Courtney closes with a faith-rooted reframe, encouraging listeners to stop trying to see the whole path before moving and instead ask for just the next right step. The episode ends on a clear, repeatable line: don't wait until you feel like it, start, and let the feeling catch up. Key Topics Covered: Why we wait for motivation instead of just starting The real order of change: action, then momentum, then motivation How "waiting for the right time" is often fear in disguise The "smallest thing I can do today" question How confidence and discipline are built through action, not before it Connecting this week's challenge back to last week's three questions Taking your next right step instead of needing the whole plan https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways Growth isn't one giant reinvention. It's built through small, ordinary choices repeated daily, the same way you'd build any habit. You don't have to choose between grace and growth. You can be proud of who you are right now and still want to become more. The biggest thing holding most of us back isn't ability, it's fear, comfort, perfectionism, or waiting for a "perfect time" that never actually comes. Summary of the episode Courtney opens this episode with an honest admission: she scrapped the entire fall series she had planned because it didn't feel right. Instead of teaching from a finish line she hasn't reached, she's kicking off a new series about becoming, walking listeners through the process of identifying who they want to grow into and taking real, ordinary steps to get there. At the center of the episode is a simple but powerful reframe: the future version of yourself isn't waiting for perfect motivation or the right circumstances. She's built one decision at a time. Courtney shares her own experiment of digging up an old daily habit tracker from three years ago and hanging it back on her wall, using it to hold herself accountable to the same questions she's asking listeners to sit with. She walks through what's actually holding people back from growth, naming fear, comfort, perfectionism, and the habit of waiting for "someday" as common culprits, while also acknowledging that some obstacles are legitimate because life really is complicated. The episode's central idea is that grace and growth aren't opposites. You can accept exactly where you are and still want more for yourself. Courtney closes with three simple questions to carry into the rest of the fall series: who do you want to become, what does that version of you do differently, and what's one thing you can do this week to move in that direction. Not ten things. Just one. Key Topics Covered: Why Courtney scrapped her original fall series and started over Getting specific about who your future self actually is The daily habit tracker experiment and why she brought it back Common reasons we stay stuck: fear, comfort, perfectionism, and "someday" Why grace and growth can coexist instead of competing Three questions to define and start moving toward your future self https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways Whether your summer was full or hard, it wasn't wasted. God meets us in every season, and guilt over an imperfect summer doesn't make it any less valuable. Instead of asking what you want to accomplish this fall, ask who you want to become. Busyness doesn't build character, it reveals it. Before fall's pace takes over, decide now which rhythms you want to protect (quiet time with God, family dinners, evening walks) and which distractions you want to leave behind (comparison, people-pleasing, your phone). In this episode of Find the Joy, Courtney closes out summer with an honest look back before stepping into fall. She celebrates the season her family just lived, from summer rec baseball and swimming lessons to her kids running wild and free-range across the farm, and invites listeners to do the same: write down a favorite memory, print a photo, hold onto what made this summer good before it's gone. But Courtney doesn't stop at the highlight reel. She turns to the women whose summer looked different, the ones who worked more than they rested, who carried doctor's appointments, financial stress, grief, or lost patience more than they'd like. Her message to them is direct: that summer wasn't wasted. God meets us in every season, even the hard ones, and the guilt that convinces us an imperfect season wasn't valuable simply isn't true. From there, Courtney reframes how to walk into fall. Rather than asking what you want to accomplish or how much you can get done, she challenges listeners to ask who they want to become, because busyness doesn't determine character, it reveals it. She walks through three questions to carry into the new season: what rhythms do I want to protect, what distractions do I want to leave behind, and where is God inviting me next. The episode closes with a prayer for fall, asking for a heart that trusts God's plan, finds beauty in small everyday things, and holds onto the promise of a brand new beginning each morning. Key Topics Covered: Looking back on summer with an honest eye, the good and the hard Releasing guilt over a season that didn't go as planned Shifting from "what do I want to accomplish" to "who do I want to become" Protecting rhythms and releasing distractions heading into fall A closing prayer for the new season https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways The invisible, unpaid work of caregiving, the meals, the laundry, the mental load, matters even when nobody says thank you for it. Rest is not quitting, laziness, or selfishness. It's obedience, modeled for us by the Sabbath, and it's how we stay in rhythm with God's provision instead of running on our own strength. Growth, in your kids, your relationships, and your own faith, often happens quietly underground long before you see the harvest, so don't measure your impact by what's visible today. In this episode of Find the Joy, Courtney sits her listeners down for an honest, coffee-shop-style conversation with the woman who keeps showing up even when she's running on empty. She names the invisible work so many women carry silently: the meals planned around everyone's preferences, the endless laundry, the appointments, the mental list that never really ends. It's a love letter to anyone who has ever wondered if any of it is actually being noticed. From there, Courtney turns the conversation toward rest, and specifically why rest is not something to feel guilty about. She reframes rest as obedience rather than laziness, pointing to the Sabbath as proof that God built rhythm and recovery into the design of life on purpose. Trying to operate at full capacity every single day isn't sustainable, and it was never the goal. The episode closes with a reminder that growth is often invisible before it's ever visible. Just like a seed planted in soil, the impact of showing up in love, praying quietly, being dependable, and staying calm under pressure, often takes time to reveal itself. Courtney reminds listeners that even when no one else notices the effort, it is never wasted, and it is always seen. Key Topics Covered: The mental load and invisible labor of caregiving Why rest is obedience, not laziness The Sabbath as a model for rhythm and recharge Trusting growth and impact you can't see yet Letting go of striving for perfection https://www.empowerhermn.com/
Takeaways Checking in with your heart, not just your calendar or to-do list, is a practice worth building into a busy season. Discomfort with silence is common, and it often masks avoidance of harder emotions, questions, or unresolved hurt. Scripture models honest prayer, not polished prayer, from David's raw psalms to Jesus's honesty in Gethsemane. Surrender follows honesty. Naming what's real comes first, letting go comes second. Five simple reflection questions can guide a weekly heart check-in: what you're carrying, grateful for, grieving, where you've seen God, and what you need to surrender. In this episode of Find the Joy, host Courtney Vroman leads listeners through a practice of checking in with their hearts as summer winds down. She opens up about her own resistance to silence and stillness, admitting that busyness often becomes a way to avoid what's really happening beneath the surface. Courtney walks through five reflection questions designed to help listeners slow down and get honest with themselves and with God. The episode moves into a deeper look at what Scripture teaches about honest prayer. Courtney points to King David's psalms, which are raw, unfiltered, and often full of hard questions like "How long, O Lord?" She notes that David is still called a man after God's own heart, not because his prayers were polished, but because he kept bringing his heart back to God. From there, Courtney turns to Jesus in the garden of Gethsemane, highlighting how his honesty about his own anguish came before his surrender, "not my will, but yours be done." The episode closes with an invitation and a challenge: take ten minutes this week to sit in real silence, without a phone or distractions, and ask God what he's trying to say to your heart. It's a gentle but pointed reminder that faith doesn't require pretending, and that God is inviting relationship, not performance. Key Topics Covered: Checking in with your heart versus your calendar or to-do list The discomfort of silence and why stillness feels so hard Guilt around avoiding quiet time with God Five reflection questions for a weekly heart check-in David's honest, unfiltered psalms as a model for prayer Jesus in Gethsemane and the order of honesty before surrender (Luke 22:44) Why God invites honesty instead of polished prayers A weekly challenge: ten minutes of real, undistracted silence https://www.empowerhermn.com/