Many people think perfectionism is about ambition or high standards. But for people with anxious attachment, perfectionism can be something else entirely: a strategy for protecting connection.

In this episode of Divergent Paths, Dr. Regina McMenomy, Ph.D., explores the powerful link between anxious attachment and perfectionism, especially for late-diagnosed neurodivergent adults. When your nervous system is constantly scanning for signs of disconnection, getting everything “right” can start to feel like the safest way to keep relationships stable.

Dr. Regina shares personal stories about how anxious attachment can show up as over-performing, self-monitoring, and trying to prevent conflict before it happens. She also explores how ADHD, rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD), and years of  ...