Ever struggled with an imposter syndrome or felt "not good enough"? Me! 🙋🏻♀️ And, I know I'm not alone!! I've been there many times and so have many other women I've come across, befriended and coached in this world. It's a sad but very true reality for many women. On today's episode, we have Allison Woodley, Self-love Coach, Holistic Fitness Expert, Speaker and award winning Author of the book, The Unicorn Syndrome - Stop trying to be unique. You already are. Press play to tune into an honest conversation on hitting low points in life and what we can do to turn those into empowering moments for the better. My hope is that you feel inspired after listening to take your challenge and current struggle and find the silver lining to make a positive change and improve. It is absolutely possible! Love, Violet Violet Ostuni, PhDc. Empowerment Life & Health Coach For Women Meditation Educator| NLP & Reiki Practitioner | Published Writer Creator of Venture Love | Venture Love Podcast | Book Free Clarity Call here. | violetlventures@gmail.com | Connect on IG here! Learn more about Allison and purchase her latest book here: Amazon: The Unicorn Syndrome Self-Love Tribe FB Group allisonwoodley.com
Being spiritual doesn't mean I howl at the moon, or that I dance in circles around a fire-pit in the nude, although given Covid, getting out to dance does sound fun right about now. I do however believe that there is something greater, bigger and stronger in this universe than what we can see p h y s i c a l l y. When life gets really hard, we tend to reach for help, and sometimes once we've exhausted our physical resources, we call to something "out there" to give a helping hand. For some this may be GOD or GUARDIAN ANGELS. For others it may be MOTHER NATURE, and for others it's through their SPIRITUALITY that they find answers and peace. Let's stop and consider one thing: man wrote the Bible, the Torah and Quran, but what was there before we could even speak or write? Where did we really come from? And if we're born to live, why must we die? It's a strange but magical cycle that continues and we're all on this journey together. Whether we like it or not, no one is exempt. Seeds are planted, they sprout and through the seasons mature, then when it's "their time" they fall apart and wither. Those bits of matter or ashes fall back into the soil and their energy awakens again, to live anew. Humans are no different. I believe in positive energy and karma and doing good, not just because it's "the right thing to do" but because it's how I choose to live my life. No one's perfect and I've grown a lot in these last few years, especially these last few months. Who I was in my twenties is definitely not who I want to continue to be. Why? Because I want to GROW! I'm changing for the better. I'm healing old wounds. I'm shedding old layers of who I thought I "should be" and embracing who I've always really been. That for me feels authentic and real... and, it's through the hard work I do on myself through my spiritual practices that I evolve. Here are 5 Ways I surrender to Spirit - Click Play to Listen!
I vividly remember the first time I heard this sentence. I was alone, probably 20 years old sitting as far back in the audience as I could in the Brava Theater Center on 24th Street. I had taken BART home from downtown and it was such a pretty day I decided to get out in the middle of the mission and explore. I can't remember where I was coming from... but I'll never forget where I ended up. As I turned left on 24th Street, I remember the sun hitting my face and all the brightly colored wrestling masks swaying in the warm wind. I never understood the fascination with them but I guess kiddos sure do love their luchador gear! As I walked further down the lively street, I stopped and grabbed an iced coffee. With no place in mind, I kept going and walked past a building with bright burgundy glass doors. I saw a few people lined up and others carrying boxes of books with brightly colored dresses rushing in and out. What is this place? I stepped in and immediately a well dressed, elderly man waved me down. "hurry up honey, shows about to start!" Before I could ask how much or even what the heck they were performing, he quickly shuffled away his check-in list, stuffed his money envelope in his back pocket, and scooted me in the door. Don't worry 'bout it, get in! Great, now I'm stuck here... what did I just get myself into? I sat on the far left side, a few rows from the back, but after the break, I didn't escape. Instead, I decided I wanted to sit C L O S E R. My curiosity pulled me in and somehow, without knowing how or why, I felt that I was in the right place at the right time. Even though I was alone, I didn't care because I was so engaged. I felt so divinely guided in that hour and a half. Press play to listen to more.
Surprise, surprise: you're not alone. It sucks being afraid and uncertain. I'm sure you know the feeling? I know I do. You decide to start something new, get super excited to begin and then... knock knock, fear comes banging at your door like a bad ex-boyfriend. Ugh.. can we not? Or, you make the choice to begin a brand new positive habit. You get in a good groove of things, you're feelin' damn good.. and everything is smooth sailing, til you hit a bump in the road and before you know it, you've given up and let yourself down. Not again... Why?! So, what makes someone's life good vs. great? The biggest difference I've learned is simple: C O N S I S T E N C Y. The difference between those who succeed and those who don't isn't how awesome they are, how brave they seem or how much education they have. It's that they were relentless in their pursuit of happiness and success. They did N O T quit. Think about every successful person you know. Whether or not you like or agree with them, they've built their success off a continuation of positive habits and rituals... aka they were consistent. Rain or shine, they showed up, even when it wasn't easy or simple. Regardless of how many doors closed in their faces and how many times they were told "no"... deep down they kept going because they believed that eventually those no's would become a "yes" and guess what? They did. Who comes to mind when I think of someone consistent and successful? Obama, J.Lo., Tony Robbins, Rachel Hollis, Jeff Bezos, Oprah... the list goes on and on. Love or hate 'em? I don't care, but I respect them. So, what can you do when fear is holding you back? Take Action: Mel Robbins has a 5 second rule which helped her overcome depression and take control of her life. Sometimes it's hard to get out of bed, but if you count from 1 to 5 like she did and immediately get up, you'll have started your day and you can get moving in the direction of your dreams: one step at a time. Choose Again: As Gabby Bernstein says, When you're clouded with toxic self-judgement or you find that you're comparing yourself to others, immediately stop and choose a single, better thought. Easier said than done, but trust me this one works every time for me. Find something, anything that feels slightly better and keep moving up the "feel better" ladder. Feel The Fear & Do It Anyways: Wanna know what gives me butterflies and sometimes bats in my belly? Exposure. Every time I hit "publish" I put myself "out there". But you wanna know a secret? The more I expose and crack myself open, the easier it gets, the more I grow and the more confident I become. Wanna know something even more powerful? YOU CAN DO IT TOO. So, what's it gonna be? Will you keep choosing to be good... or are you going to truly commit and become great? And by great, I mean that great version of you, you KNOW you can be.
Before I lay it all out there... I'd like to preface this by saying that I've learned so much this past year about friends, family, my husband, work and mostly, about myself. I've learned more than ever what feels good, and more importantly - what doesn't. 🙅🏻♀️ So, what does this emotional "purge" include? Basically anything and everything that no longer serves me. The list I have is pretty decent in my journal, 📝but today I'll provide my top 3 which I know will help remind you of your power in clarity and choice! As you've heard me say a bajillion times, take what works for you... and leave the rest behind. Here are 3 Things I'm saying "NO" To in 2022: Excuses I think I've said "I'm too busy" a lot this part year. Sure, most of the time I was really busy and trying to multitask, but if I think hard and deep about this response, it ties me to a culture of "doing too much" and being busy because that's what we are expected to be, to be successful or worthy. Yes, trust me, I keep myself very busy with work and my business, passion projects and my growing family, and I do try my best to make time for meaningful relationships with people who inspire, love and support me, but I know switching the "I'm too busy" general go-to line for the following more accurate phrases makes better sense and feels more honest, such as: I'd love to go, but I'm tired and pregnant women need rest! I'm growing a human! 😅 How about next week when things settle down a bit? I just got back from my trip! I'll need to pass. Sounds fun but I have personal deadlines that mean a lot to me. Thank you for understanding! Let's catch up in a few weeks. Procrastination Embarrassingly, I have learned that I am a queen for making "miracles happen" at the last minute.. 😬 aren't most of us when we have a critical deadline? Well, that feels like being in college and I'm way past that. I'm going to be a mother in few months! I know I can't completely wipe that clean from my plate or sense of being, but here's my effort to try! I've learned that if a task just feels so dreadful or unnecessary or heavy - I simply won't do it and I won't let myself feel bad about it. I'll just scratch it off my list and be done with it. "Next!" 👋🏻 And no, I'm not talking about letting dishes pile in the sink, but I'm talking about saying no to things that simply aren't in alignment with who I am and who I want to be. I've learned that procrastination doesn't always mean that you're lazy, it could very well mean that that task just simply isn't worth your valuable energy or time! So my tip: scratch it off your to do list and move on! Press play to listen to more!
So, how do you prepare for a busy week of personal and professional life?? As someone who has tried just about everything to set myself for success when it comes to starting a new week, there are a number of things I personally love to do which work for me. Depending on the day or how I'm feeling, I'll meditate, go for a walk, eat a healthy breakfast or get more sleep if I'm feeling tired and on most days, if not all, I find myself stating an affirmation, even without even realizing it! Sure, not everything I've listed here will be perfectly suited for you, but that's okay. Try it out, keep what works and leave the rest behind. What exactly are affirmations? Positive affirmations are phrases and statements that you repeat to help challenge negative thoughts and encourage positive changes in your life. For those of you new to the term, you can simply say the statements aloud or quietly in your mind to yourself to help inspire you towards achieving that goal, desire or to help bring some peace during stressful or hard times. For me, they're a bit more than that. I know sometimes repeating things just for the sake of saying them isn't great or helpful and yep, it can be frustrating to not see results or the thing you want, but what I've learned the hard way is that - nothing works... unless you do. This means that you have to have faith. You have to believe. You have to be a vibrational, energetic match for that thing you so desire so that you can be in better alignment to receive it. Guess what would happen to me anytime I've repeatedly stated something I wanted but deep down doubted myself? That's right; I never got it. And guess what happened every time I fully felt that thing I wanted, took big deep breaths in, closed my eyes for a few minutes to visualize it so much that I felt my hands get warm, and my heart start to race because of how excited I was to receive it??! You're right again: I got it. It's that simple or that difficult and you get to decide. So, what do I tell myself to excitedly jump out of bed and start the week off right? Here are 5 Simple Affirmations: Feel free to adopt these if they feel good to you, or get creative and create your own! I can handle everything that comes my way. I am always protected and guided. I am love. I radiate love. I am worthy of love. I can do this. There's nothing I can't do. Everything I desire, is already mine. The most important piece is to get energetically "serious" about your desire or affirmation. And, by "serious" I mean, truly believe in it. Have faith in it. Envision yourself doing or having that thing you most want and also just as important, take action towards obtaining it. Also, be open to receiving what you want, even if it's not in the manner you originally envisioned it coming. Press play to continue listening! :)
No More Mr. Maybe! Not getting what or who we want sucks, right? Whether it's a raise, a role, a partner, or hitting "that" goal, it hurts and we feel low about it. I know.. I've been there. Earlier today this message popped up in my dms: "Violet, why the hell isn't this working? I've done too much to make this relationship work and now he's pulling back. What am I doing wrong? I'm fed up. Help?" My heart sunk a bit. I felt for her, and before I started drafting some empowering message like I normally would, I sat back and reflected just how freaking awful that feels.. because girl, I know. It's shitty. It hurts. Unrequited love is the worst kinda love there is. I know because I've been there. It f'n hurts. You want it so bad to "work". You see others posting all the perfect lovey-dovey photos you dream of living and you can't help but grow anger, hate.. even jealousy. How do I know? Well, I'm human and I'm a woman and yes, I admit I've felt every emotion under this sun for many reasons and I'd have to admit that love sometimes makes you a damn fool. How do I know? Well, "hi, here I am.. welcome and hello!" I've been one, many times. So I know. I do. Wanna know something else? I don't regret any decision I made in the past as a "fool" because as much as rejection or pain hurt, I learned so much about myself in the process of that pain and those chapters in my past life and I'd like to share a few of them with you. 1 (of many) big lessons I've learned in relationships: When you chase a butterfly... it flies away. But when you sit in all your calming, happy, self-fulfilled glory, it comes to embrace you, accompany you, play with you and love you. It craves your energy, it doesn't stray from it. If you're an emotional, neurotic chicken running around with its head cut off, making accusations, chasing, stalking, screaming or manipulating, you are only damaging yourself. Check yourself - as best as you can in the moment and I mean it. I've felt all the crazy feelings before when my trust was broken in past relationships and it's hard to "check yourself" when your heart is pounding and your tears are nonstop flowing and your hands want to hug the poison that also seems to be your medicine.. it's hard, but it's not impossible. If there's a will, there is always a way. Remember that you are deserving of all the love in this world, yes YOU. You don't need to be rich or skinny or have perfect skin or the best job or the straightest teeth. You don't. If you love yourself truly, madly deeply, he will too. If you respect yourself truly, madly, deeply, he will too. You are not a doormat darling, so please stop acting like one. If you're crying or frustrated in this moment reading this, know that I've been there. Many, many times. I've wasted so much damn mascara and eyeliner in my life and damaged so many pretty white pillowcases, so if it's gotta happen now, then cry it all out girl and let it be the last time you exert this precious energy on some fool unworthy of your love. Click Play to listen to the rest. Love, Violet
33 Life Tips For Every Woman Yesterday was my birthday. I woke up at 5am and found Vito watching TV on the couch. Poor guy was suffering from jetlag too. We just got back from Italy and here we were, wide awake in our pitch black living room standing in wrinkled pjs. He ran towards me and said "Happy Birthday!! I love you so much!" and kissed me all over. Next, he guided me back to bed where he pulled out a crumpled letter from his nightstand drawer. It's been a few years since he wrote me a letter so I was pleasantly surprised. I could hardly read it... (his handwriting is just... well, his handwriting) so I asked that he read it aloud for me. :) Immediately I started tearing up. He reminded me of all the beautiful blessings this year has brought us and then he said... "next year will be the very best because you won't just be Violet anymore, you'll be someones mommy." I still cannot believe I'm having a baby!! I mean I can, but sometimes it feels so surreal. So, as a now 34 year old woman (no longer an infant, baby, toddler, child or teen, but WOMAN... here are some helpful lessons and blessings I've learned along the sometimes rocky, bumpy, beautiful way and I hope they help you too! As always, take what works... and leave the rest behind! Time waits for no one.. including you. Do what you want NOW. Tomorrow is not guaranteed. Perfection will keep you stuck. Do things imperfectly and they will lead you to a life beyond your wildest dreams. Speak up. Speak up. Speak up. If something doesn't feel right - it isn't! Not all relationships last forever whether it's with family, friendships, professional or romantic. Each WILL however teach you a valuable lesson. Take that lesson and keep growing. If you never ask, the answer is always no! Ask. You'll only feel dumb tossing and turning all night "wondering" versus actually knowing! (Trust me I know.) Less is more. Having a 100 fake friends will never match up to having a handful of true, honest, kind, supportive and loving people. Energy is everything. If you feel depleted after being with someone, that is a huge sign that you need to reduce your valuable time with them and reconsider more healthy and vibrant relationships. Bye felicia! LISTEN to your intuition - Actions will always speak louder than words. Someone can promise you the galaxy and all the stars in it, but if they aren't willing to walk that talk... then put on your shoes, grab your purse, keys and go! Toxic people teach you things - The biggest lesson is that they teach you never to behave like them. They teach you what you want to avoid in the next chapter of your life. Appreciate the lesson and move forward. Counting calories and weighing yourself will never make healthy. You can eat a bag of spinach a day and run 6 miles and be f'n miserable. Instead count your blessings. Eat intuitively, eat clean, drink lots of water, rest, laugh, do things that make your heart race, try new healthy, colorful organic foods, mix them with the ones you love and move in ways that make you feel good. Yoga or running doesn't work for all. Maybe for you its swimming or even hip hop or belly dance! The "looking good" part will come faster than you think when you live this way. You'll also be so much happier! Click play to listen to the rest! Love, Violet
Struggle with C O N S I S T E N C Y? You’re not alone! I think we all struggle with it and it S U C K S!!! I know. Being consistent is something every single client I’ve ever worked with has struggled with and it’s super common. We all want to do the things we know are good for us but when it comes down to “making it happen” we pause … waste time…. do something else to fill the time… and we procrastinate till we have 5 mins left! How do I know?? Well, I’m human. So what do I recommend? There are a number of things that have helped me get my “act together” and some of those I use to this day. Grab a pen. Here are 3 tips to help you improve your consistency! 1) Buy and USE a daily journal. 📔 Write down your goals every day. You are 42% more likely to achieve your goals IF you write them down every day. Why? Because you’re faced with them daily and reminded to get to work! 2) Speak your desires into existence.🔊 Let them be known. Hold yourself accountable. I find that when I post something publicly I’m 100% more likely to follow through. Why? Because I want to be responsible for my actions. I’m not talking about them just to blab about it - I mean it. I’m determined and I’m proving myself by doing what I said I would do. Nothing bothers me more than people who say then will commit to something and then make endless excuses. That's so 2021.. hah! 😅 It’s a brand new year! No more of that. You can do better. I know you can. 3) Find a coach or accountability partner that will elevate you and make your desires: non-negotiable. 📞 Friends are great and so darn fun to talk to, but most of the time those conversations go off on many tangents and it doesn’t help you stick to what you said you would when you’re not fully focused on what’s most important: your desires and goals!! Investing in a coach is one of the best things I ever did! It helped me fine-tune-focus on my goals. Having someone you trust who truly supports you and wants more than anything to see you grow and achieve your dreams is so beautiful. It’s honestly one of the reasons I do this work because I get to see you evolve, grow and transform into this massive goal-achiever, full of confidence and I LIVE FOR THIS!! Nothing is better! 🥳🥳🥳 So, want even more tips, support and love so you can start this new year right and feeling damn good?! 🙌🏻 Join me for my 1 DAY ONLY, FREE LIVE WORKSHOP, A FRESH START TO 2022" on Wednesday, Jan 12, 6pm PT.
Hi! My name is Violet, and I’m obsessed with all things personal development. As a Life, Health, Wellness and Meditation Coach, I love empowering you through difficult seasons of life so you can venture and live a life you truly love! Join me as I cover topics on health and wellness, money, business, work, great relationships, not-so-great relationships, love, loss, family, achieving those beautiful goals, creating balance, growth and so much more!! Consider this your one-stop-honest-shop for a little happy hour blended with your personal school of life. Grab a drink, get cozy, and get ready to be challenged and inspired while you learn. This the Venture Love Podcast. Learn more about Violet here: https://www.ventureviolet.com/about Connect with Violet here: https://www.instagram.com/violet_ventures/ and here: https://www.instagram.com/venturelovepodcast/ If you're interested in being a potential guest on my podcast, fill out this form so we can connect! https://forms.gle/wd8N2HnS3eaaz2Da7