Despite insistence, this episode of the podcast gets all sombre as the boys desperately reach for integrity. Frankly, I feel that I've lost control of them. At every turn, they cut corners, disregard my direction and scrounge for loopholes in their contracts by interpreting it literally. They are as dirty Geordie TRAMPS, combing madly for pennies on a pissy Saturday cobblestone.

So please allow me to redress the balance with some observational comedy.

We all know the suffix "logue", right? We've all seen it. It means, "a combining form used in the names of kinds of discourse, spoken or written". Unmistakably. So take the noun "analogue", right. CRUCIALLY NOT THE ADJECTIVE. Well, if you look a little closer, that could mean "discourse concerning the anus", couldn't it? "Talking out one's arse" takes on a whole new meani ...