Today I’m sharing another conversation with Issac Roth about the state of the world as I was seeing it in August 2020 which was admittedly a little grim aided by old memories from OpenShift & Red Hat. This was a couple months before we knew things would get worse with wildfires in California and Oregon (I couldn’t outside for a solid week or more). In the last published episode (recorded in October 2020), Issac shared his experience of almost losing his house in the California wildfires. Issac helps clarify what I was seeing and experiencing in the world (not positive at all) and naturally weaves in his past experiences in startups and our time at at Red Hat creating OpenShift. Issac’s optimism is a natural and effective antidote. I love Issac’s calming presence, wisdom, optimism and unique way of seeing the world. Conversation Highlights Troubling current events and the themes of uncertainty, anxiety and instability Remembering that I have a choice and wanting to use it My own internal conflict about what I’m personally experiencing what I help people with The entrepreneurial journey of holding uncertainty while being super positive and how to manage those doubts Issac’s biggest fears when we were creating OpenShift and how he managed them Building a product based on anticipated usage when real customers are few The constant refinement of priorities, resources and time Reserving time for serendipity Experimenting full fidelity and it’s impact on the data you collect Pushing a boulder up a hill–fulfilling fate or creating fate The ups and downs of startup life How does one find hope in times of uncertainty? The urge to just want things to be okay or know that they will be okay–certainty The distinction between fidelity and integrity Acting in the public or private good Making decisions in a time of very little data without a known framework The apparent absence of truth creates anxiety Taking a “So. What.” perspective to your situation Learn more about Issac Roth Shasta Ventures LinkedIn Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod Original photo source All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 104: Issac Roth–Experimenting with Fidelity appeared first on John Poelstra.
Issac Roth and I cover a wide-range of topics linked to our personal lives, our work together at Red Hat and the technology world in general–all sparked by wildfires he almost lost his house to. Issac and I go back to the early days of OpenShift at Red Hat. This conversation is not about that though maybe some day we’ll do one. Today I’m sharing a reflective Saturday morning conversation we had in October 2020 about what Issac is seeing in technology and the world around him. It’s an exploration and reflection on what it was like to be five houses away from having his house destroyed by fire and the process he and his family went through to save as much as they could. Conversation Highlights John and Issac reconnect after a long while Wildfires in the California were stopped five houses away from Issac’s The world is decomposing and it’s not necessarily a bad thing The internet enables decomposition Decomposition makes space for new things The Long Tail: Why the Future of Business Is Selling Less of More by Chris Anderson The Long Tail is already happening TikTok has millions and millions of videos instead of one movie Platforms like BandCamp and SoundCloud Finding smaller ways to influence policy and the big divide More choices leads to decomposition which makes way for new things Fire as a good thing Controlled burns Tree species that require fire to germinate seeds Purging old stuff often makes us feel better and creates space Possibility as the opposite of scarcity Empty space and lack of consumption makes room for creativity and possibility Parallels between the startup world and a burned out forest Consciously creating space in the day to have all the time that’s needed Cross pollinating ideas between different communities TikTok as a way to connect and experience people completely different than ourselves New technologies that help us connect were made possible because of decomposition The things that technology enables also comes with tradeoffs Makes privilege gap wider Exchange of personal privacy The systematic process Issac and his partner went through to evacuate their house, save what was most important and say good bye How the process of almost losing his home changed Issac and the parallels he sees to technology and the environment The changing nature of story telling with TikTok and Instagram John’s version of better story telling The meaning and focus we give is a choice Sometimes our thought patterns and beliefs need to be decomposed Setting aside fear and living with uncertainty The practice of creating space to deal with uncertainty Celebrating uncertainty The opposite of fearing what’s around the bend “Showing up to serendipity with preparedness” Is the future brighter than we think as a result of decomposition? Possibility does not negate the things that are hard to be with Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod Original photo source All songs licensed under <a href="http
I’m back in another conversation with Brad Solomon. Today’s episode is more for the newer coach as we get into the mechanics of effective coaching. If you have a casual interest in coaching or are curious about what makes it it work you may find this episode interesting. And as is usually the case, Brad and I meander into other areas too. This conversation is also on YouTube if you prefer to view it there. The visual will explain my reference to lots of books and the virtual background I was using. It was also a fun reference to a previous episode where I referred to reading less books. Conversation Highlights You don’t have to answer every question you are asked Especially when there’s a trap or assumption baked into the question Answer the question you want to Problems with the question, “How does that make you feel?” It feels like therapy It has the implicit assumption that something has the power to make us feel a certain way (instead of having a choice) Thoughts drive feelings, drive actions Trying to listen and formulate a question at the same time just doesn’t work well Listening with your body instead When you are listening deeply it’s often possible to turn the last thing the person said into the next question Over time and through experience you learn to trust your intuition and that in the moment the next thing to say will appear Sometimes the next thing to say is, “I have no idea what to ask you next” and that is completely okay Handling situations where the person you are coaching doesn’t know what to say or how to answer Seeing your intuition like a dashboard light in your car Awareness that the light is on vs. knowing exactly what it means Keep your questions simple and ask one “I’m not here to answer your questions. I’m here to question your answers.” Experiencing the difference between mentoring and coaching Navigating coaching moments that don’t seem to be going well The job of the coach is to help people move forward–different than solving their problem The power of asking permission to speak a “truth” Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod Original photo source All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 102: Questioning Your Answers appeared first on John Poelstra.
Brad Solomon and I continue our reflections and riffs about what’s present to us. This time it’s about being present, journaling, and the power (and difficulty) of getting clear about what you want. Conversation Highlights My longest answer ever to “how are you doing?” Showing up as the best version of whatever is present My break from the news through Future Self Journaling Learned about it from Carolyn Andrews Weekly newsletter and podcast called The Sunday Soother How talk therapy stopped working for her Brad’s reflection that therapy focuses on the past and coaching focuses on the future–what modality do we have that focuses on the present? Neither of us is missing our break from Twitter and the way it brings us down Learning from animals–how clean their requests are and how easily they let things go “What do you desire?” Often a more powerful self-inquiry than “What do you want?” or “What do you need?” “Reported on world” vs. a “created world” The obligations we find ourselves under often come from our past–woulds, coulds, shoulds, need to, etc. When you are doing something you love you don’t have to push yourself forward What story are you telling yourself? What story do you want to be in? Humans seem to be the only animal that puts barriers in the way of what they want Daily writing exercise about what you want What’s really going on “inside here” instead of “what’s going on outside there?” You can’t figure out what you want if you aren’t completely honest with yourself Write down what you want For extra power and clarity read it out loud More Episodes Exploring What You Want What Do You Want? (21) Figuring Out What You Want with Tina Robinson (56) Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod Original photo source All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 101: What Do You Really Want? appeared first on John Poelstra.
Brad Solomon and I set off on another unplanned exploration into what’s present to us in the moment, including sharing childhood pictures of ourselves. This is a rebroadcast of a conversation I had with Brad Solomon, Founder and CEO of the CTG Group in the UK on his podcast called The Lockdown Sessions. The Lockdown Sessions is a weekly podcast, hosted by Brad that explores reflections on a broad range of topics including self awareness, self management, learning and development issues and personal growth. For this conversation there is also a video on Youtube. If that’s your jam and if you want to see what I looked like when I was four years-old (and many years later in present times) you can see it there. We keep coming back to The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom by Don Miguel Ruiz, but this episode is definitely lighter on the book references the our previous conversation. Conversation Highlights Coaching from an un-nuanced and unfiltered place Our word creates–what are you creating with it? Is being late to meetings your “brand?” Being impeccable with our word or cleaning it up We cannot bring meaning to a situation for another person (only they can) Even though we think we can Even though we try Do you re-play and re-create conversations in your head? How does it benefit you? Changing situations by how you are being and who you bring to the conversation versus saying the perfect thing you figured out from a past interaction Brad likes to ask What did I want to happen? Can I envision it? Do I have clarity of the purpose? How did I get in the way? Owning my role in the conversation How we get in our own way Embracing our inner 4-year-old Seeing the 4-year-old in others as a way of connection and compassion Ways of asking permission to say hard things and designing agreements Listening to our intuition Saying it out loud even if we aren’t sure Unattached to interpreting it correctly Cleaning up what doesn’t work John wonders when the “lock down sessions” will end and the “freedom sessions” will begin Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 100: Your Four-Year-Old Self appeared first on John Poelstra.
Ken Dreyer and I discuss The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever by Michael Bungay Stanier. Our conversation evaluates the book and examines Ken’s experiences putting it to work. Ken is not a coach. My hope is that this conversation shows how simple coaching techniques can help you be a better leader no matter what your role is. Conversation Highlights You don’t have to be an official coach to benefit from the concepts in this book Ken would re-title the book “How to ask good questions” When you give advice over and over again you become the team oracle The book lists seven good questions to ask and examines how each one helps They aren’t meant to be a formula You must build rapport–you can’t just ask the questions and be effective How many times do you just provide the answer? The power and effectiveness of silence Taking notes on interactions at meetings Increases engagement Evaluate what’s going on for yourself Privately vent if it’s not going well Ask yourself questions privately that might change the situation or unlock how you can help The valuable dimensions of asking one question (and closing your mouth) Understanding and avoiding the Karpman Drama Triangle Hero Villain Victim Jim Dethmer elaborates on the Karpman Drama Triangle in this podcast https://fs.blog/jim-dethmer/ Where the questions from The Coaching Habit fit (and where they don’t) and how you might decide Thinking like an Intreprenuer Where it makes sense to give advice Joint participation in solving the problem vs. taking the whole thing on How to help someone who is in a constant state of “I don’t know” A great article by Rick Tamlyn on “I don’t know” (not mentioned and found after we recorded) Steve Chandler: Agreements vs. Expectations (a game changer in any relationship) If you are in a mentor role, consider how coaching (not giving advice) might create a more powerful outcome Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 99: Exploring The Coaching Habit with Ken Dreyer appeared first on John Poelstra.
Brad Solomon and I talk about all the books we’ve started and not finished, what the full catastrophe of life is and how implementing what you know is more powerful than continuing to acquire more knowledge. This is a rebroadcast of a conversation I had with Brad Solomon, Founder and CEO of the CTG Group in the UK on his podcast called The Lockdown Sessions. The Lockdown Sessions is a weekly podcast, hosted by Brad that explores reflections on a broad range of topics including self awareness, self management, learning and development issues and personal growth. Conversation Highlights Full Catastrophe Living How many books do you have on your shelf that you have not finished? Are you reading a book simply to complete it? What if you worked from a very small list of books and implemented everything in those books? Brad likes getabstract.com for short summaries of important books The Four Agreements Being impeccable with our word Not taking things personally Brad believes this is THE best personal development book ever written and the one he recommends the most Creating with our Word Our experience “pulling cards” and the uncanny truth we’ve found in them Trusting our own inner-knowing (what we already know) and how coaching turns the volume up on that Creating the space to help people truly find and determine their own path Brad pushes me on how I really know when to pick up a book or not Asking the moment what it needs and often waiting for the next one What if the solution to your next problem came from sitting in a room by yourself uninterrupted for 30 minutes with a piece of paper and a pen? Does everyone need a coach? Brad believes everyone could do with a little therapy Brad’s observations in his current work as a therapist with children and teens The first things to come out of our mouth are usually not the most important which makes “What else?” such a powerful question Reading books and collecting ideas from everywhere except inside ourselves stops us from having our own thinking and innovation Books Mentioned Yes, the irony is not lost on me that I’ve included quite a list of books from our conversation and I advocate reading less (and implementing more). Full Catastrophe Living: Using the Wisdom of Your Body and Mind to Face Stress, Pain, and Illness by Jon Kabat-Zinn Straight-Line Leadership: Tools for Living with Velocity and Power in Turbulent Times by Dusan Djukich Trillion Dollar Coach: The Leadership Playbook of Silicon Valley’s Bill Campbell by Eric Schmidt, Jonathan Rosenberg, and Alan Eagle Podcast interview with Eric Schmidt by Tim Ferriss about the book Reboot: Leadership and the Art of Growing Up by Jerry Colonna Podcast discussion: Jerry Colonna and Tim Ferriss Podcast discussion: <a href="https://onbeing.
Brad Solomon and I explore the power of choosing, experiments, discipline, habits and what we are making of the time that is COVID-19. This is a rebroadcast of a conversation I had with Brad Solomon, Founder and CEO of the CTG Group in the UK on his podcast called The Lockdown Sessions. The Lockdown Sessions is a weekly podcast, hosted by Brad that explores reflections on a broad range of topics including self awareness, self management, learning and development issues and personal growth. To give the current events we mention some context we recorded this at the beginning of June in 2020. We met through a mutual acquaintance at Red Hat around our common interest in coaching and leadership development. Doing this series with Brad is a lot of fun. We never plan what we are going to talk about. We meet online, push record and whatever wants to unfold does… much like a great coaching conversation. We are both coaches so you’ll see our conversation often gravitate in that direction, however, I believe there are other things you can take from what we share and are learning in our own lives that may be helpful to you. Conversation Highlights Selecting certain times to make the most of learning and how that’s not always possible Choosing to create a positive outlook through conscious actions Working remote is not a new thing Looking inside before looking outside–the news isn’t a good place to start the day Removing news and social media apps from your phone You can choose to change the sound-track in your head My relationship to discipline and habits Pick and do what is YOU Surfing the waves of what’s going on Ebb and flow Stalled, stuck and drowning because of not choosing COVID–19 has given the entire world the unique experience of globally experiencing the same thing at the same time The cumulative affect of spending 10 minutes every day learning something new Choosing to find the 10 minutes An experiment that does not work is not a failure–it’s learning The fear of starting something that we might want to stop so we don’t start Being on the lookout for judgement Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 97: CHOOSING in an “I Don’t Know” World appeared first on John Poelstra.
Alexis Monville and I discuss The Anatomy of Peace, a pivotal book in my own personal transformation and path to discarding judgement. It turns out that people in conflict value something else more highly than they value solutions. The Anatomy of Peace shows what this is and demonstrates how conflicts at home, conflicts at work, and conflicts in the world stem from the same root cause. Furthermore, the book shows how we systematically misunderstand the cause and unwittingly perpetuate the very problems we think we are trying to solve. p. vii – The Anatomy of Peace Conversation Highlights Alexis Monville joins me in this conversation Change starts with us Where are you coming from and who are you being? Others respond more to how we are being than our actual behavior Change start with who you are being Focusing more energy on helping things go right instead of fixing what is wrong Re-enforcing and praising behavior you want to see more of instead correcting the behavior you don’t want to experience It’s difficult to fake the true state of your heart (or who you are being) Noticing what a heart at war or peace feels like in our body Seeing others as a person (heart at peace) versus an object or obstacle (heart at war) Examining the different boxes we approach situations from The conflict loops that we get stuck in and blame other people for Judgement is usually at play when we are in conflict Judgement of others Judgement of ourselves When we have judgement towards ourselves we are often judging others as well This is a choice too Practicing Hoʻoponopono as an antidote to judgement I’m sorry Please forgive me Thank you I love you Forgiveness as an act of creation–Gary Mahler More About The Anatomy of Peace Great summaries of each chapter Diagrams from the book Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod Original photo source All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 96: The Power of a Heart at Peace appeared first on John Poelstra.
Here’s how I salvaged a day that might have turned out very differently though the simple act of writing down what was going on in my head. The Process Bullet or write out everything on your mind to get it all out Declare what you want to create or the day you want to have Create a list of the things you will say “yes” and “no” to that will support what you want to create Credits Hallon by Christian Bjoerklund Cold Funk by Kevin MacLeod Original photo source All songs licensed under Creative Commons The post 95: Journaling to Save the Day appeared first on John Poelstra.