Are You Keeping a Placeholder Around?

We often talk about being someone’s placeholder — the person they keep around while waiting for someone they really want. But have you ever stopped to consider whether you might be the one keeping a placeholder around?

Sometimes, we entertain connections because we enjoy the attention, affection, companionship, or simply having someone to talk to. We might not necessarily see a future with them, but having them around feels good. And when you’re lonely or navigating life on your own, that connection can feel like just what you need in the moment.

But what happens when the comfort of having someone around starts making you overlook what you actually want?

In this episode, I explore how placeholders can keep us in the waiting room, how temporary fulfilment can create unnecessary emotional labour, and how the desire for companionship can blur our judgement and lead us to settle for connections that don’t align with our long-term desires.