Vladimir Putin commences an invasion on Ukraine in an unprovoked act of vodka tasting communist aggression. Though he seems at the moment to have bitten off more than he can chew as Ukraine and the Western Allies unite to bring crippling sanctions on the global front, and deadly battle on the local front. Biden of course is claiming credit for new more aggressive economic penalties against Russia after offering a slew of weak sanctions against the communist country last week. In reality Europe has led the way with Biden reluctantly following like a scared child.

Far left actor Sean Penn reveals that he is in Ukraine filming a documentary on the Russian invasion, proving once and for all that he’s even crazier than originally believed. An actress delivers slam poetry to Putin about how much better his life would be if she were his mother. El ...