Listen up, besties—Simone and Hilary are back for another episode of Super Definitely Not Problematic, where we ask the hard-hitting questions, expose flawed designs (both cosmic and anatomical), and fight for justice where it matters (like friendship monogamy and proper animal naming conventions).

First up: 69s. Let’s be honest, this position is for no one. Who designed it? (Men) Who benefits? (Men) Why does it feel like a poorly planned IKEA bunk bed of disappointment? (And once again… men) We break down why this so-called sexy number is a logistical nightmare and why we, as a society, need to retire it.

Then, naturally, we pivot to Zodiac signs, because nothing says nuanced debate like deciding someone’s entire personality based on their birth month and what time they were born. Are Geminis really the villains? Are Le ...