Are you ready for some football?

Presuming, of course, that we're speaking in American 21st century cultural sport slang... the one where football is played with a prolate spheroid and pits steroid-fueled madmen against each other in a gladiator-like setting as drunken Las Vegas visitors morph into rabid observers salivating over the violent action as well as their jalapeno poppers who join living room parties throughout the homeland all tuned to CBS Sports' broadcast of SUPERBOWL 58.

On this day of unity, we become a nation filled with willing devotees who, at least for one day, dedicate their lives' purpose to the "unknown" outcome that eventually bounces out of that chaotic, silly, little prolate spheroid thing-a-ma-jig-ball-imposter and whether or not it matches the squares they purchased in their office gambling pool.

This  ...