I Surrender my Bitterness

I Surrender my Bitterness

There’s not much we can do about our past, but we can choose to grow beyond what happened back then. To surrender the past is to make peace with it, to trust in God’s sovereign ability to make something good out of pain. Our story is not erased, but remembered, then surrendered.

No one sets out to be bitter. When we list desired character traits, we don’t write “bitterness” on our list. But the insidiousness of trauma, pain, and hurt push against our hearts, and when we spend more time ruminating over the offense rather than continually surrendering it to God, we run into the very real possibility that we’re edging toward a bitter heart.

But first, we must explore our grief and provide space to lament. Bitterness comes from not addressing a moral injury (typically). We must walk backwards from our bitter thoughts and keep asking questions.

·Why do I feel this way?

·What happened to hurt me?

·Who am I embittered against?

·Have I grieved?

·What am I afraid to address?

We live in a broken, sin-scarred world, and we have a soul enemy who delights in trying to destroy us. No wonder we’re walking wounded or bitterness threatens!

Sometimes we don’t know why we’re hurting until we write it out, stark on the pages of a journal. For me, that certainly helps, but what furthers my healing is processing it aloud with a loved one. It’s then I understand the nature of my pain. To have someone there absorbing it and reflecting back is enlightening. Plus we receive prayer and feedback.

Bitterness need not be an inevitability of your life. To surrender it means you open your heart for lament, then healing, to codify what hurt you. It is right to share your pain with the One who made you, rather than ignoring your very real pain in hopes that it will go away. Sadly, punched down pain grows unhindered, but processed pain has a chance to heal.

The opposite of a bitter heart is a tender one. Hosea 10:12 reminds us, “Plant the good seeds of righteousness, and you will harvest a crop of love. Plow the hard ground of your hearts, for now is the time to seek the Lord, that he may come and shower righteousness upon you” (NLT). Hearts can grow hard, but we can seek God and plow hard soil so that it becomes a seedbed of hope.

Prayer: Jesus, I surrender my bitterness to you. I don’t want to live hard hearted anymore. I want to soften. An embittered life only breeds contempt and isolation, so set me free from my pain, my demand to be heard, and my desperation for vindication. Break up the hard soil of my heart, so you can grow something beautiful. Amen.