Every once in a while the news reminds you that the average adult human probably shouldn’t be trusted with car keys, children, or access to a Target self-checkout machine. This show is basically a full hour of that realization happening in real time. 

We get into a criminal mastermind who stole trading cards by scanning taco seasoning packets, a toddler somehow drinking meth out of a sippy cup, and a guy who managed to get arrested during his own driver’s license test while the instructor was sitting right next to him. Somewhere along the way the conversation veers into ancestry DNA tests, sleep apnea, and pizza hatred. 

We also read listener confessions and another round of “I Wish I Didn’t Know That,” which proves once again the internet contains information no human brain ever needed.

Welcome to America’ ...