You cannot control your spouse, but you can transform your marriage by shifting focus to your own growth and mastering healthy conflict resolution.

In this deep-dive Q&A, Josh and Ashley Negron explore the most frequently asked questions from their marriage studies to help couples move from complacency to deep connection. They tackle high-intensity topics like the destructive nature of "below the belt" moves—such as yelling and name-calling—which break emotional safety and distract from actual problem-solving. The conversation shifts toward the dangers of bottling up emotions, offering a powerful reframe: "When you did X, it made me feel Y. Was that your intent?" By identifying "me problems" versus "you problems" and becoming a dedicated student of your partner's fears and triggers, you can replace "harsh startups" with cooperative comm ...