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After The Quiet

After The Quiet

por After the Quiet

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Temporada 1

Finding love after abuse

After separating in 2019, I had finally become comfortable being alone. Then, during COVID, a spontaneous $9.99 Tinder purchase led me to the man who would become my partner. My children welcomed him, our families blended easily, and for the first time in years, life felt genuinely happy. But beneath the amusement-park trips, skating nights, rides home from school, and new family memories, something was beginning to change. My ex started objecting to my partner's relationship with my sons, and slowly, my children began pulling away. In Episode 101 of After the Quiet, I share how finding love after an abusive marriage gave me hope for a new beginning—and how that happiness became another source of conflict after separation. What looked like a peaceful new chapter was about to become the beginning of a painful shift in my relationship with my children.

Calm Before The Storm: Co-Parenting

Can an abusive relationship ever seem peaceful again? In Episode 100 of After the Quiet, I reflect on a surprising chapter during the COVID-19 pandemic when the conflict between my ex-husband and me appeared to quiet down. We co-parented more peacefully, he showed unexpected concern for my health, invited me to Christmas dinner with our children, and for the first time since our separation, I believed we might truly build a healthy co-parenting relationship. I also share how his new relationship brought hope for a united front for our children and why this period left me believing the worst was finally behind us. This episode explores coercive control, post-separation abuse, co-parenting after divorce, emotional manipulation, and the confusing moments when calm can make you believe lasting change is possible.

The Family I Thought I’d Lost

What if one of your greatest fears after leaving an abusive relationship never comes true? In Episode 99 of After the Quiet, I share the emotional story of attending my former husband's grandfather's funeral and the unexpected support I received from the family I thought I had lost forever. As I navigated co-parenting challenges, grief, and continued post-separation abuse, I discovered that the people who had known me for 24 years could see through the lies. This episode explores coercive control, post-separation abuse, family relationships, grief, and the healing that comes from being truly seen and believed. If you've ever feared losing an entire family after leaving a relationship, this episode is a reminder that genuine relationships are built on years of shared love—not on someone else's version of the truth.

Reunification Therapy, COVID, and Finding Peace

What happens when you're trying to rebuild your relationship with your children while navigating post-separation abuse? In Episode 98 of After the Quiet, I share the challenges of parenting after separation as my sons began living with me 50/50, the heartbreaking morning battles to get them to school, and the emotional toll of being told I was failing as a mother. I also discuss the reunification therapy that was meant to help repair our relationship, why it ultimately failed, and the unexpected lessons I learned from a therapist about boundaries and coercive control. Finally, I reflect on how the COVID-19 lockdowns—while devastating for so many—gave me something I hadn't experienced in years: a chance to breathe, connect with my children, and finally experience a small measure of peace. This episode explores post-separation abuse, reunification therapy, parental alienation, coercive control, and the complicated journey of healing after leaving an abusive relationship.

False Children’s Aid Reports

What happens when false reports to Children's Aid become another form of post-separation abuse? In Episode 97 of After the Quiet, I share the emotional impact of being investigated twice by Children's Aid Society after anonymous allegations claimed my home was unsafe, I abused alcohol, and I neglected my children. Despite both investigations finding no concerns, the experience left me questioning every parenting decision I made. I also share the heartbreaking moment my oldest son lashed out after I set a boundary, and how coercive control continued to affect my relationship with my children long after I left the marriage. This episode explores post-separation abuse, coercive control, false allegations, parental alienation, and the lasting emotional toll of trying to parent under constant scrutiny.

Starting Over After Separation

What does it really mean to start over after leaving an abusive relationship? In Episode 96 of After the Quiet, I share what life looked like after selling our family home and moving in with my mother while my ex settled into a new house. I talk about the heartbreaking reality of trying to reconnect with my sons, believing I had to spend money to earn their love, the challenges of qualifying for a mortgage without a separation agreement, and the joy of finally buying my own home just before my 40th birthday. This episode explores post-separation abuse, coercive control, parental alienation, reunification therapy, and the emotional journey of rebuilding a life after domestic abuse. If you've ever wondered what comes after leaving, this episode offers an honest look at the challenges—and the hope—of starting over.

The Things I Never Got Back

What do you really lose when you leave an abusive relationship? In Episode 95 of After the Quiet, I share the emotional experience of returning to our family home after separation to pack my belongings—only to find the primary bedroom locked, treasured keepsakes inaccessible, and many of the household items we had agreed to divide already gone. I reflect on the grief of losing irreplaceable memories, the physical toll trauma took on my body, and how abuse continues to affect survivors long after they leave. This episode explores post-separation abuse, coercive control, trauma stored in the body, and the long journey of healing. If you've ever wondered why survivors can still be triggered years later, this episode offers a deeply personal perspective on recovery and resilience.

The Smear Campaign

What happens when an abuser doesn't let go after you leave? In Episode 93 of After the Quiet, I share how the abuse changed after separation through a devastating smear campaign. False accusations of affairs, lies told to my children, family, friends, neighbours, and coworkers, and years of retaliation became the next chapter of coercive control. I also discuss the lasting impact these lies had on my children and why abuse doesn't always end when a relationship does. This episode explores post-separation abuse, parental alienation, emotional manipulation, and the long-term effects of coercive control. If you're supporting a survivor or trying to understand what happens after someone leaves an abusive relationship, this episode offers an honest and deeply personal perspective.

Why Didn’t I Leave Sooner?

Why do people stay in abusive relationships? In Episode 92 of After the Quiet, I answer one of the most common questions survivors are asked: "Why didn't you leave sooner?" I share the complexities behind my decision to stay—from the happy years at the beginning of my marriage, to blaming stress and myself for his behaviour, to the comfort of a close-knit extended family, financial stability, and the carefully crafted image he presented to the world. This episode explores why coercive control is so difficult to recognize and why the good moments never erase the abuse. If you've ever wondered why survivors stay, this honest conversation offers insight, compassion, and understanding.

Other Flags I Missed

What happens when even reading a book, saying hello to a neighbour, or enjoying a quiet moment becomes a reason for punishment? In Episode 91 of After the Quiet, I share the everyday acts of emotional abuse and coercive control that slowly stripped away my identity. From humiliation disguised as a joke to false accusations of affairs, this episode explores how coercive control invades every corner of a person's life, leaving them isolated, fearful, and questioning their own reality. If you've ever wondered how emotional abuse escalates without leaving visible bruises, this episode offers an honest look inside that experience.

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